New Normal
by Lynnlee22
Summary: Philly AU
1. Chapter 1

If only all days could be like this—the sun shining, a slight breeze blowing, the sound of her daughter's musical laughter floating through the air—it was a perfect day. If all days could be like this, the world would be a better, happier place.

"Do you see him yet?"

Phyllis smiled as she gently gave the swing another push. "Not yet, baby, but it's still a little bit early. He'll be here. He always is, right?"

"Uh huh," Aly grinned, nodding her head excitedly as she pumped her legs for the swing to go even higher. Phyllis sighed contentedly; it was hard to feel bad about anything with those eyes staring back at you. Those big brown eyes could break her heart, change her mind, and lift her spirits in mere seconds without so much as a word. She had so much of her Daddy in her, not only in looks but in her personality.

It was evident in the smallest things—in the way she smiled her sweetest little smile when she knew she was in trouble, how she loved to be the center of attention, how, even at the age of three, she could knew how to make you laugh and she took such joy in doing it.

Her greatest fear had been costing her daughter that kind of joy. It had taken far too long for her to find her happiness with Billy. They had fought their feelings, fought their love, fought their attraction for months before finally admitting that they were the only thing standing in their way. Her pregnancy hadn't been the reason for the wedding, it had simply hurried things along a bit. In retrospect, maybe that was it—maybe it wasn't about whether they should or shouldn't have got married. Maybe it wasn't about whether they made a mistake or not. Maybe it was about the timing of it all. Maybe it was about the scars the both bore. Maybe it was the baggage they both brought with them and the fact that at some point, it just became too heavy to carry. They loved each other too much to keep hurting each other.

In the end it was the fights, the words said in anger that could never be taken back—that was what had decided it. That had been the final blow. It ended the day they had hurt each other enough to stop it—when they loved each other too much to keep fighting.

"Daddy!" Aly squealed with delight as she jumped from the swing and took off towards him.

Billy smiled as he kneeled down on the ground to hug her, not worrying at all about his clothes or the dirt. He relished the feeling of his daughter rushing into his arms. He cherished these moments. As he wrapped his arms around her and lifted her high up on his shoulders, he took a few steps across the park to the swing where Phyllis stood.

"Hey." His eyes met hers, his voice immediately softening. It was hard not to react to her. Even though it had been nearly eight months since the divorce had been finalized, even though he'd seemingly moved on, he still found himself occasionally forgetting that he didn't come home to her. That she wasn't in his life in that way anymore. If he was honest with himself he always believed that when they got married—it would be forever.

She forced a smile, not wanting to let him see how much it really hurt her to see him looking so well. Did she want to see him miserable, in pain, destitute? Of course not—well not really. It just killed her to think that she might less to him than he was to her. Did he not spend nights wondering if it could have been different? Did he not wonder if they made a mistake? If they gave up too quickly? If they should have tried harder?

Apparently not. He'd moved on—really moved on.

"She missed you," she said cheerfully, tickling her daughter's side as she smiled up at her.

"I missed her too," Billy said. "It's good to be back." He shifted his weight, the awkwardness of the moment weighing heavily on him now.

"Did uh…Did the two of you have a nice time…a nice trip?" She didn't care and she didn't want to know, but this is what friends did, right? They asked the polite questions about the things that they were supposed to care about.

"Yeah, the weather was great. The ship was great. It was nice."

"Where's Heather?" Aly chirped, inserting herself into the conversation at the first lull.

Phyllis sighed in relief at the distraction. This was one of the benefits to having a toddler around—never a dull moment.

"Heather's in the car actually," Billy stammered, glancing at Phyllis a bit awkwardly, "So we better get a move on." He reached down for the bag that sat beside her feet. "Is this everything?"

She nodded. "Yeah, that's it. I'll pick her up Sunday afternoon if that works for you or you can bring her by my place…whatever works."

"We'll figure it out. I'll call you and let you know." Silence settled over them again. He took a slow breath. "Uh, Aly, why don't you come down and give your Mom a hug and kiss goodbye."

Billy carefully brought the little girl down to her feet and smiled as he watched Phyllis wrap her arms around her.

"Bye Mommy," she whispered.

"Bye sweet girl. I'll call you tonight okay?"

Aly nodded sweetly as she reached back to take Billy's hand.

"I'll see you later," Billy said softly as he walked away, taking a quick moment to glance back over his shoulder as he made his way to the car.

Phyllis watched them until they were out of sight. Slowly she walked over to the bench and sat down. The sun was still shining. The breeze was still blowing. She could still hear the laughter of children floating through the air in the park, but it was no longer a perfect day.


	2. Chapter 2

"You know, you could buy her a stuffed animal for way cheaper at the toy store."

Billy turned, glancing over his shoulder as he held Aly up throw another ball. "But she wouldn't have as much fun and besides, didn't you ever play these games as a kid?" He smiled, turning his attention back to his daughter as she screamed in delight as the ball finally hit the target.

"Actually, no—My parents didn't take me to these things. Dad said they were run by charlatans and thieves and, being here now, he was not wrong." Heather narrowed her eyes as she glanced around the carnival lot.

"Well, she's having fun and that's all I care about." Aly turned around, hugging the small pink unicorn. "Look," she grinned, holding the animal up to Heather.

Heather smiled. "I see that. I guess we need to come up with a name, huh?"

Aly shook her head as she took her hand. "I'll have to wait til I get home and ask Mommy. Mommy always helps me name my animals."

"I could help you name this one," Heather offered, glancing up at Billy for approval, "Since it'll be staying at our house. What do you think? Is it a boy or a girl?"

"I'll ask Mommy later….when I call her tonight." Her big, brown eyes gazed up at Billy. "I can call her tonight, right Daddy?"

"Of course you can. You know you can call Mommy anytime you want." He breathed a sigh of relief as he saw the smile return to his daughter's face.

Aly was young—soon to be four, but somehow she picked up on far more than he anticipated. Though the divorce had been amicable for the most part, she still sensed the tension that existed between her parents and she did her best to navigate. It broke his heart to watch his daughter tread so carefully on around him—as if she wanted to protect his feelings—even if she was too young to realize it.

And Heather, well that was a whole other situation. It wasn't that Aly didn't like her—quite the opposite. Aly liked her quite a bit until she began to realize that Heather was playing a role, a role she had no need for.

"Look!" Billy raised his head to follow his daughter's outstretched hand. The merry go round sat in the center of the park.

"Can we ride it, Daddy?"

"Sure we can," Billy said with a smile. "Why don't we look for three horses real close together so we can all sit beside each other."

"Okay," Aly chirped happily as she began to scope out the offerings.

Billy glanced over at Heather who smiled gratefully at him. It would never be the way it was…that was once in a lifetime, but he hoped—in time—maybe they could all be happy.

* * *

"This is really lovely." Phyllis stared down at her plate as the waiter lifted the dome.

"I took the liberty of ordering for you. I hope you don't mind. In restaurants like this, I always go with the chef's specialty." Mark carefully unfolded the cloth napkin and placed it across his laps.

"Well, it looks beautiful." She reached for her fork, hesitating for a moment.

"What's the matter?"

"I just…I don't really care for capers, that's all. I wonder if we could ask the chef to prepare one without them."

Mark furrowed his brow. "You don't ask the chef to make changes to a signature dish, sweetheart. That's rude. Just try the capers…I'm sure you'll like it. He's worked in the best restaurants in the world. I'm sure his palette is more refined."

Phyllis sighed, taking a bite, the acidic brine immediately assaulting her mouth. She chewed quickly, swallowing hard before taking a drink of wine. Forcing a smile she whispered, "You're right, of course. It's lovely."

He smiled. "See, I told you it would be. Oh." He stopped for a moment, reaching into his jacket and pulling out a small box. "I almost forgot. I have something for you."

"Mark." Her mouth fell open as she looked at the box. For a moment she'd been afraid it was a ring, but the box was far too large for that. The relief that flooded her body was strange, but now certainly wasn't the time to open that door. She reached out, taking the box in her hand. "You didn't need to do that."

"That's the fun part," he smiled, "I didn't need to. I get to. Go ahead, open it."

She opened the box to reveal a gorgeous pair of emerald and diamond earrings. "Mark," she breathed. "They're beautiful…really. This is too much."

"Not at all. I just closed a huge deal and this is the least I could do since I've been out of town so much. We've barely been able to see each other these last few weeks."

Phyllis blinked. How sad was it to say she'd hardly noticed. When they were together, Mark spent much of the time on the phone, taking business calls, or returning text messages that were simply too urgent to wait. There was always a reason for the distraction and every missed date or preoccupied conversation brought another gift, another promise to do better, and he did…sometimes.

Like tonight, she thought to herself, he hadn't taken a single call. In fact, she was fairly certain he hadn't even looked at his phone.

"And there's one more thing." He pulled out a small bag and handed it to her. "This is for Aly."

"Mark." Phyllis shook her head. "Honestly, this is too much."

"Look…I know you didn't really want to introduce me the other day and I'm really sorry about that. I had no idea she was at the office or I never would have stopped by like that. I know you wanted to wait until we were sure where this was going, but now that I've met her….I just wanted to do something nice for her too."

"You did…if you recall…you took us both out for pizza, and a movie, and ice cream….on a school night. I'm fairly certain you are her new favorite person. You might have even achieved superhero status."

"Well, I'm touched, but it's nothing really. Just a necklace..and no diamonds are precious stones..just a pearl."

Phyllis smiled. "She'll love it. Thank you." She reached across the table to take his hand, feeling for the first time that things might actually work out.

His head turned suddenly as he reached into his pocket. He grabbed his phone, glancing down at the screen. "I'm really sorry," he said quickly, glancing up at her, "I really have to take this. I'll just be a second."

The air left her lungs as she watched him walk away from the table. So much for hoping.

* * *

"You all set?" Billy pulled the covers up just under her arms as he softly kissed her forehead. "You talked to Mommy, you brushed your teeth, you had your story….what's left?"

"Prayers," Aly said quietly, her eyes beaming up at him.

"Right," Billy whispered, as he took a seat beside her on her bed. "You ready?" Aly nodded.

 _"Five little angels around my bed. One at the foot and one at the head. One to sing, and one to pray, and one to take my fears away."_ Billy smiled as he said he words with his daughter.

"Dear God, please bless Mommy and Daddy and Heather and Johnny and Katie and Summer and Daniel and Grandma Jill and Grandpa Colin and Mark and the man at the place who gave me the toy, and my teacher at school, and all my friends and everybody….I think that's all..Amen."

Billy sat quietly for a moment. "Aly—sweetie, who's Mark?"

Aly yawned, turning over on her side and hugging her unicorn close. "He's Mommy's friend," she said simply. "Night Night, Daddy."

Billy stood up, leaning down to kiss her head before reaching over and turning off the lamp that sat on the table beside her bed. As he gently pulled the door to a close, he tried to process the words she said. "Mommy's friend."

* * *

Heather turned as she heard his footsteps on the stairs.

"She asleep?" she asked as she saw the confused look on his face.

"Yeah, she is."

"What's the matter? You look weird." She patted a spot beside her on the couch and Billy slowly walked towards her and took a seat.

"I don't know…maybe nothing," he said quietly. "It's just…when Aly was saying her prayers she was naming all these people."

"She always does that, right? She names half of Genoa City," Heather smiled.

"Yeah, I know, but tonight she named a Mark."

Heather stopped for a moment. "Maybe it's someone from her school or maybe it's a character from a tv show or a name in a book. Who knows with kids…"

"No, she told me who it was…" His face grew serious as he looked at Heather, suddenly wondering if she was the person he should be talking to. "She said Mark was Mommy's friend."

Heather leaned forward, refilling her glass with wine and pouring a glass for Billy. "So, Phyllis has a friend, what's the big deal about that?"

"It's not just a friend, Heather. It's a male friend."

"Right…and you have a wife…"

Billy sighed. "That's not what I mean. I'm not upset because I'm jealous or anything. I just feel like it's something she should have mentioned to me. We have a child together. Aly spends half her time living with Phyllis which means if there's a man in Phyllis' life, there's a new man in Aly's life and I have a right to know what's going on in my daughter's life."

"I suppose that's true, but are you sure this man really isn't just a friend. Maybe he's someone she works with and Aly happened to meet him. Maybe he really is Mommy's friend."

"Maybe." He took a drink of wine. "Damn it."

"What?"

"The ad mock ups. I left them at the office. I need them for that meeting tomorrow." Billy leaned back against the couch, his fingers running through his hair.

"Can't you leave early enough in the morning to go by the office and pick them up?"

"I could, but I promised Aly I'd take her to school and I hate to drop her off that early." He paused. "Tell you what…I'll run out and get them. I'll be there and back in half an hour."

Heather sighed. "Alright, but hurry back. It's not often we both have a free night and a sleeping kid." She flashed a smile at him.

"You've got my word." Billy rushed out of the house, pulling the door closed quickly behind him. As he shut the door of the car, he looked in the back seat, the ad mock ups sitting in the portfolio right where he'd left them. He had something important to tend to, but it didn't have anything to do with work.

* * *

"Just a second." Phyllis pulled her robe tight around her body as she flipped on the porch light. Her heart pounded as her eyes fell on Billy. Quickly she jerked the door open. "Is Aly alright?"

Billy winced. He hadn't considered how showing up late at night, unannounced might look. "Yeah," he said softly, touching her arm, to steady her already trembling body. "She's fine. I'm sorry. I should have called. I didn't mean to scare you."

He could see her shoulders fall, the air leaving her body in a sigh of utter and complete relief. "Thank God," she breathed. "What in the hell are you doing here, Billy? You scared me to death." She stepped aside, allowing him to walk inside before closing the door.

"I need to ask you something."

"And this something was so important that it couldn't wait until the sun came up?"

"In retrospect, yes it could have waited, but I needed to know…" He looked at her, the weight of her eyes on him suddenly making him question why he was really here. "Who's Mark?"

"What?"

"Mark? Who is he?"

"How do you know about Mark?"

"Our daughter mentioned him in her prayers tonight. She said he's your friend and I was just wondering if you intend to make it a habit to introduce men to our daughter without telling me anything about them."

The look in her eyes was response enough.

"Wait," he said quickly, "I'm sorry that came out wrong."

"Oh, I think it came out exactly the way you intended it to come out and I don't think I like it one bit. For your information…Mark is a friend and, not that I owe you any explanation, he and I have gone out a few times. I had no intention of introducing him to Aly, but he happened to come by the office when she was there after school the other day. He took us both out for pizza and a movie and then out for ice cream. Aly really liked him. That's it. That's my huge crime."

"Phyllis…" He hung his head. Slapping him across the face would have been less painful. "I'm sorry…I didn't mean to…I shouldn't have."

"No, you shouldn't have. Now, if you're done berating me, it's late and I'd like to get some sleep."

Billy nodded, walking back towards the door. He stood in the doorway, looking back at her once more. "I really am sorry, Phyllis."

"Fine." She nodded, watching in silence as he took a few steps towards his car. "Oh, and Billy,"

He turned back towards her, his eyes hopeful.

"You don't need to worry. When I get serious with anyone, I'll let you know. For now, I'm taking things slow. I'm certainly not looking to rush into marriage or anything."

He watched as the door slammed shut and the porch light shut off.

"That went well," he muttered as he climbed back into his car.


	3. Chapter 3

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Heather pulled her hair across her shoulder and waited for Billy to fasten the clasp on the necklace. "I can think of about twenty different ways this can turn into a disaster."

Billy smiled. "I don't really have a choice. When I asked her about this guy, it didn't exactly go over well…" He stopped, his mind flashing back to the night a few weeks ago. He hadn't told Heather about that conversation, telling her instead that he'd caught Phyllis at the office the next day. That wasn't exactly a lie either. They had talked at the office the next day. A good night's sleep had done absolutely nothing to put Phyllis in a more forgiving mood though and, when she suggested they all go out to dinner together so 'everyone would be on the same page', he had no other choice.

"What about saying no—did you ever think about that?" She smiled up at him. "I'm not trying to be harsh, but I can't think of a worse way to spend an evening than sitting across from your ex-wife and her new boyfriend."

 _Boyfriend._

He was thankful he wasn't facing her when she said the word as he was certain his face betrayed him. Try as he might, he couldn't be okay with it. In his heart, Phyllis would always belong with him even if his head knew differently.

* * *

"Everything okay?" Phyllis looked over at Mark who had barely taken his eyes off the screen the entire ride over.

"Yeah, it's fine. I've just got to deal with all this."

"You have to deal with it all tonight?" She sighed as she looked out the window at the cars passing by. She wondered how many people sat happily in those cars. How many people were in them making memories, sharing conversations, and how many people were just like her—just going through the motions—just existing.

* * *

Billy pulled out the chair, waiting for Heather to sit down before gently pushing her towards the table. He took a seat next to her, taking a slow, steady breath in an attempt to calm his nerves.

"So, is there anything in particular I need to know before she gets here?" Heather leaned in closer to him with a slight smile on her face. "Any hot button issues to avoid? Is she gonna try to stab me with a fork or anything?"

"Phyllis isn't like that." The words left his lips in a sort of reminiscent blissfulness.

Her face grew serious—she hadn't missed his sudden change in tone and demeanor and he didn't miss her reaction. "I just mean..it's not like Phyllis is holding some kind of torch for me. We're here to meet the new guy in her life. That should make it pretty clear that she's not…"

The words faded as his eyes fell on her. She walked into the room, standing close—too close—beside him. His arm wrapped low around her waist, his hand pressed against the small of her back. She wore a black dress, one he hadn't seen before. It hugged her body in all the right places and she walked as if she knew it.

Billy remembered all too well what it was like to walk into a room beside her, to watch heads turn and mouths drop and to know that no matter what, she was coming home with you.

Except she wasn't. Not anymore.

It was this guy now and he couldn't even bother to hang up his phone to appreciate the moment.

His legs moved of their own volition. Going through the motions was nothing new for him. Heather stepped away from the table and out ahead of him, her perfected smile beaming.

"Hi," she said cheerfully, "It's so nice to finally get a chance to sit down with you and talk." She extended her hand and Billy watched nervously as Phyllis flashed a polite smile and shook her hand. He watched her eyes drift over to his for just a moment, a surge of heat rippling through him. She still got to him. She probably always would.

"Likewise," she whispered, walking over to their table as she glanced behind her over to the man who stood next to her. Billy watched in slight amusement as her eyes narrowed. He knew that look—the furrowed brow, the pursed lips, the tightened jaw—she was irritated, and for once, it wasn't with him.

Mark seemed to notice. "Just handle it alright? I'm gonna have to call you back." Mark huffed as he ended the call and shoved the phone into his pocket. He flashed an apologetic smile at Phyllis before stepping in front of her and sticking out his hand. "Mark McMillan."

He leaned forward, taking Heather's hand and pressing a quick kiss on her cheek. Turning his gaze towards Billy, he shook his hand and smiled. "I've heard a lot about you."

"Wish I could say the same," Billy said quietly, his polite tone just barely covering the snark in his remark.

"Billy-" Phyllis warned, stepping up beside mark, her eyes still glaring at him.

"No disrespect intended." Billy smiled, holding up his hands in surrender. "I only meant that I haven't heard much about Mr. McMillan here and I'm looking forward to getting to know him better. That's all."

Phyllis sighed. "Great." She glanced back at Mark, then over at Heather before stepping over to the table and pulling out her own chair. "Shall we?"

* * *

"Can't someone else take care of it?" Billy glanced back at the table from the small corridor where he and Heather stood. "This is really important and I'd appreciate it if you'd stay and help me out here."

"Billy, I wish I could, but I really have to go. If anyone else could handle it, I'd pass it off. I would, I swear, but I spent weeks setting up this shoot and Marah is a fantastic assistant. For her to call and say she needs me to come, it must be a serious disaster."

"You want to see a serious disaster, just stick around here for a few more minutes. I swear if he picks that phone up again, she's gonna shove it so far up his…"

As if on cue Heather's phone sounded again. She breathed, flashing sad eyes at him. "I'm really sorry, but I have to go." She stepped back over to the table where Phyllis looked up, happy to see them return.

"Everything alright?" Phyllis asked.

Billy looked over at Mark, who now had turned his body away from the conversation entirely as he spoke into his phone in hushed tones.

"Well," he muttered, "it looks like we've both chosen people with very demanding jobs."

Billy took a seat as Heather reached for her purse.

"I'm really sorry," she whispered as she leaned down and pressed a quick kiss on his cheek. She looked over at Phyllis. "It's a work thing that I have to take care of. I hope we can do this another time."

Phyllis nodded as she watched her walk away. She looked across the table at Billy's face which told the whole story. "It's okay you know." She smiled awkwardly at him. "You don't have to stay. It's not like you're going to be missing out on some scintillating conversation."

His eyes softened. He could be selfish and, leave it to Phyllis, to call him out and make him feel bad and not the least bit defensive.

"I'm sorry," he said quietly. "It's not like your night is going that great either, huh?"

"It's not always like this. He's just got a lot going on right now. A lot of deals up in the air." She drew in a long breath. Every word she said was a much for her own comfort as it was to convince him.

"Right." He couldn't stop staring at her. It wasn't as if he expected tonight to be easy. He knew watching her with someone else would be hard, but if she'd seemed happy—truly happy—he thought he could be happy for her.

This was not happy. Sitting here, he watched her—watched her eyes mainly. It was a conscious effort on her part to avoid eye contact with him. Instead she seemed transfixed on the couples as they spun around the dance floor. She smiled slightly as pair after pair drifted past their table, the music floating through the room. Phyllis loved dancing and instead of holding her close to him and showing her off for all the world to see, this idiot was sitting there on his phone.

"Come on." He stood quickly, holding out his hand towards her. He had to take advantage of this brief moment of honest interaction. Giving himself time to think, to question his intentions would only further complicate matters.

"Billy." She looked over at Mark, how hadn't even looked up from his phone long enough to notice they were missing a dinner guest. Her head tilted towards him, her shoulders shrugging sadly, "I can't. I mean.."

"I'm sure he won't mind." He could see her hesitation, the look in her eyes that meant she was talking herself out of it.

"You don't mind, do you Mark? Mark?!" He repeated his name louder the second time.

"Excuse me a moment," Mark said into the phone, his tone terse. He smiled politely as he glanced up at Billy, "I'm sorry, what?"

"You don't mind if I borrow Phyllis for a dance, right?"

"No..No..of course not.." He turned back to the phone, not even looking back at her. "No, damn it. That wasn't the deal." He stood, holding the phone to his ear as he walked towards a more quiet area of the restaurant.

"See," Billy grinned. "He's fine with it."

Phyllis sighed, her resolve weakening as she watched him flash her a most disarming grin.

"You don't want to waste a dress like that just sitting at a table." His smile widened as he watched the corners of her lips twitch as her eyes sparkled up at him. She slowly stood, placing her small hand in his.

"I'm flattered you noticed," she whispered.

"You knew I'd notice." He moved with confidence, aptly finding the least populated corner of the dance floor. They were comfortable with each other—always had been. Even now, even when they were seemingly with other people, there was no problem falling back into the old pattern.

Her body fit perfectly against his, her head reaching his shoulder as if she'd been molded to fit perfectly in his arms. His hand found its spot on the small of her back, the warmth of his touch against her bare flesh sending a chill through her that made her tremble all over.

He felt her shake and he pulled her tighter against him, her warm, heavy breath tickling the sensitive skin behind his ear.

She drew in a breath, forcing herself to speak. "This is nice," she whispered, leaning back a bit to look into his eyes.

"Yeah it is." He watched as she smiled shyly at him, looking away when the eye contact became too much.

"What?" she asked as he laughed softly.

"Nothing," he smiled, "It's just..Aly..she does that same little smile—the one you just did. She does it all the time." He paused, his eyes staring into hers as his hand reached up to softly caress her face. "She reminds me so much of you."

"She's got your sense of humor," Phyllis replied, bringing her hand up to find his and slowly sliding it down to rest on her shoulder. She allowed her hand to rest there on top of his as she continued, "And your charm…and your eyes." Her voice trailed off.

"She's beautiful…just like her Mom." The words were whispered, breathy and, were it not for their close contact, she never would have been able to hear him.

Phyllis felt his breath against her cheek as she saw his lips coming closer to her. She felt her eyes closing—an almost involuntary response.

The change in music startled her and her eyes flew open as a sharp intake of breath flooded her body. "I can't. I can't do this." She stepped away, pressing her hands gently against his chest and putting space between them. She blinked hard, looking up at him and then away again. "I'm sorry. I just…I can't be here."

And with that, she was gone.

* * *

She walked into the living room, closing the door before allowing the tears to fall. She loved her daughter with all her heart, but she was grateful she was staying with a friend tonight. At four years old, Aly was incredibly insightful and she'd pick up on the fact that she was upset in seconds. Children shouldn't have to comfort their parents.

Phyllis walked slowly over to the couch. She'd done this before. She knew how this worked. Feelings didn't go away overnight and she never expected they would, but it was supposed to get easier—little by little—bit by bit…not harder. It shouldn't get harder to see him, to think about him, to be around him. Moments like tonight shouldn't keep happening over and over again. It made her question everything—how she felt, what she wanted, if she made a mistake.

Was it a mistake?

* * *

 _"Phyllis! Phyllis! Would you wait a minute? Please! Would you just listen to me?"_

 _She turned to face him, her eyes wet with tears—tears of embarrassment, tears of pain, tears of anger. "Tell me that he was lying, Billy. Tell me that he's a drunk or that he's old and senile or that he's some sadistic old prick that's just trying to make trouble. Tell me that, Billy. Please tell me that!"_

 _He closed his eyes. "Just let me explain."_

 _Her hand clasped tight around her mouth, the wail almost primal as it echoed through the room. "How could you do it?"_

 _"I did it for you."_

 _She whirled around, sheer rage flashing in her eyes. "Don't you do that. Don't you try and blame this on me. I never asked you to do this. I would never ask you to do this. Why in God's name would you ever even think I would want to get a job this way?"_

 _"It's not about that." He reached out to touch her, sighing as she jerked away. "Would you just sit down and let me talk to you. Just let me explain."_

 _"Fine." She sat, staring at him, her face stern, her eyes still flashing in anger and pain. "Talk."_

 _"You deserved that job. You know it and I know it, but it's a good old boys club….that's the way the company has always been and they were never gonna give the job to a woman…no matter how good you were, no matter how qualified you were." He shook his head as he watched her face. "When they first mentioned it, I thought it was a joke. I thought they were kidding and when I realized they weren't…when I realized they would really give you the job….I just…" He stopped, looking into her eyes._

 _"You deserved that job."_

 _"Do you have any idea what it felt like to have that idiot announce to the entire team tonight that you won my position in a poker game, Billy? Do you have any idea how humiliating it is to find out that you are so pathetic that your husband has to gamble to get you a position in a company?"_

 _"You're not pathetic, Phyllis. No one there thinks you're pathetic. You're turned that entire division around. Everyone there thinks so. Darren is an asshole. He was just doing what he always does."_

 _"He was telling the truth which is more than I can say for you."_

 _"Phyllis." He shook his head, running his fingers through his hair. "I don't know what else to say. I just knew you deserved it."_

 _"My God!" She screamed as she stood up and stared at him. "Do you honestly think that's what this is about? Do you think I'm this upset about a stupid job?" She sat back down, grabbing his hands in hers as she stared at him. "You made decisions about my life for me. You lied to me for over a year. You kept information from me. You gambled—even if it was just one game. We're supposed to be a team. We're supposed to tell each other the truth…all the time. No secrets. That was the deal, remember?"_

 _"Of course I remember, but I knew this would hurt you and I didn't see the need to upset when.."_

 _"I am so damn tired of people thinking they know what I need better than I do. You don't get to decide if I can handle information or not. You don't get to decide what version of the story I get. I get the truth, the whole truth—all the time. No exceptions. I don't want to be protected. I don't want a guard dog. I want a husband. I want a partner."_

 _"Okay." He held her hands tight in his. "Okay. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I won't even keep anything from you again. Total honesty. Cards all out on the table—from now on…no exceptions. Promise. Okay?" He watched as she stared at him, her face unchanged. "Phyllis? We are okay, right?"_

* * *

She filled the glass with wine, leaning back against the couch as she took a long drink. She'd never really forgiven him for that. Every little thing circled back to the same argument until one day, she simply stopped trying. She resented his constant need to protect her—as if she wasn't capable of protecting herself. She didn't trust him. She didn't think she ever could again. And the more she pulled away, the tighter he held on. At the time, it made her crazy.

But tonight, as she danced in his arms, being held didn't feel so bad.


	4. Chapter 4

"Alright. Yeah. Sure. I'll see you when you get back." Phyllis looked out the window as she listened to Mark explain the events of his earlier meeting.

"Someone's having a birth.." Lauren stopped short as Phyllis whirled around and gestured wildly with her hands.

"Ok. Yeah. Bye." She ended the call, smiling as she looked over at Lauren. "Sorry about that."

"No. I'm sorry. I didn't realize you were on the phone." Lauren sat the bottle of champagne and glasses on the table as she studied her friend's face. "I take it Mark's not gonna make it back in time to celebrate tonight?"

Lauren could tell by the look on her friend's face that she was disappointed, but she knew Phyllis well enough to know she'd never admit it. Mark wasn't good enough for her and Phyllis seemed to be the only person who didn't realize it.

"Oh, it's alright," Phyllis shrugged. "Birthdays aren't that big of a deal anyway."

"Says who?" Lauren protested, walking over to wrap her arms around her friend. "You know what? I've got an idea, why don't you and I throw on something fabulous and have a girl's night? What do you think?"

Phyllis smiled appreciatively, "That's nice of you to offer, but if you have a night free, you should spend it with your husband, I know that's where you'd rather be."

"Now, that's simply not true." Lauren shook her head. "I want to celebrate my best friend's birthday."

"You know what I really wanna do?"

Lauren grinned, happy she'd finally convinced her to choose an activity. "No, but whatever it is, you've got it."

"I want to go home at a reasonable hour, change into my sweats, order in Chinese, and drink wine. Billy has Aly tonight. I'm totally free."

"Phyllis," Lauren sighed, "That sounds pretty depressing. Spending your birthday all alone…"

"Do you remember what it was like to have a four year old in the house?" Phyllis grinned. "Being alone for a night will be like a mini-vacation."

Lauren laughed, "Alright, but only if you're sure."

"I am," she sighed, "Tonight will be perfect."

"Alright. Well then, I guess I'm gonna take off and go find that handsome husband of mine—see if I can convince him to paint the town red with me."

"Somehow I doubt that's going to be a hard sell." Phyllis smiled at her friend as she headed out the door.

* * *

"Billy." Lauren said, quietly, surprised to see him standing near the office door. "I'm sorry. I wasn't expecting to see you here. Did you need something? Phyllis is still inside."

"No. I don't need anything," he said quickly. "I was actually looking for Ashley. I thought she might have been meeting with you."

"No. I haven't seen Ashley today at all. It's just me and Phyllis here and I'm actually on my way out."

Billy glanced through the partially opened door to see Phyllis sitting behind her desk. "It's fine," he said slightly distracted.

Lauren watched him intently, wondering about his true motivation. She could see the look in his eyes, the way they softened ever so slightly, at the mere mention of her name. "Do you want to speak to Phyllis?," she asked quietly, her lips curving into the slightest of smiles.

"No, I don't. I just..I guess I'm just surprised to see Phyllis here this late. It's her birthday and I just figured she'd be out celebrating with …what's his name." Billy knew his name, quite well, but giving him a name made it more real. For now, he preferred to live in his comfortable state of denial.

Lauren shook her head, not the least bit confused as to what was happening. "Actually no," she muttered, "Mark's out of town. He won't make it back to celebrate tonight. She's planning to spend the night at home—all alone." She watched with interest as Billy's eyes flickered.

"She says she's okay with it, you know," she continued, "but birthdays can be funny things for women. I don't think anyone really wants to spend one alone." She pressed the button on the elevator, smiling to herself as she waited for the door to open. "Just saying," she whispered as she stepped inside the now open door.

Billy stood quiet for a moment as he watched the elevator doors close. He was a bit stunned. Why was Lauren encouraging this? Didn't she know he was married and Phyllis was with…Mark? They weren't together anymore. He didn't get holidays, special events, and birthdays. That was for family, and he wasn't. He stopped.

Aly. He had to pick Aly up from his mother's. There was nothing wrong with a father taking his daughter to pick up a birthday gift for her mother, right?

He headed towards the elevator with renewed purpose. He had to hurry. There was a lot to do before tonight.

* * *

"What if she didn't see her phone?" Aly asked for the twentieth time that night.

Billy smiled as he smoothed the cloth on the picnic table. "I'm sure Mommy got the message and she'll be here. I know she was very happy to know you planned something special just for her birthday."

Aly beamed. "She's here, Daddy! She's here!"

Billy watched as Phyllis approached them, her eyes widening in amazement as she took in the scene. "What is all this?" Her voice was almost a whisper.

"It's for your birthday!" Aly yelped happily, throwing her arms around her mother's waist and wrapping her arms around her neck as Phyllis knelt down to her level.

"Really? You did all this for me?" She spoke to Aly, but locked eyes with Billy. While Aly may have been completely on board with anything that involved a party in the park, she could see Billy's fingerprints all over this.

The picnic table was covered with flower filled vases and the simple wicker picnic basket added an almost romantic touch.

"I hope you're hungry," Billy said with a smile as he gestured over to the picnic table. He stepped a little closer to her, lowering his voice to a whisper as Aly busied herself by laying out plates. "I let Aly plan the menu," he grinned. "Sorry."

"So what's for dinner?" Phyllis asked, as she watched her daughter.

"Chicken fingers, macaroni and cheese, and grapes," Aly chirped proudly, "And juice."

Billy shrugged as he saw a smile spread across Phyllis' face. "It sounds delicious," she said happily, before turning back to look at him, softening her voice a bit before speaking directly to him, "Really. It's perfect."

* * *

She watched as Aly happily played in the sandbox. "Welp, I think we've officially been deserted."

"Well, you know it's hard to compete with a sandbox." He smiled as he reached into the basket. "I must admit, I cheated a little." Billy pulled out two wrapped brownies and a bottle of wine and glasses. "Just for the grownups," he whispered.

Phyllis laughed. "Very smooth—but you better hope you have a breath mint. She'll sniff out that chocolate on your breath like a bloodhound and then…you've got some explaining to do."

He coughed, nearly choking on a bit of brownie. "Like mother, like daughter, huh?"

Her smile faded as she stared at him. It was hard being here with him, being there as a family—it was hard that this was so easy.

"Oh," Billy said, happy to have something to break the silence. "I almost forgot..Aly picked this out for you." He held out a plain white box, secured with a simple red ribbon and a forget me not flower.

Phyllis smiled at him as she carefully removed the ribbon and flower and lifted the lid. She felt her heartbeat quicken as her eyes read the words engraved on the simple, silver bracelet, _Love You Forever_

Her eyes raised to meet his, a thin sheen of tears covering the emerald orbs.

"It's from Aly," he whispered, his eyes locked on hers.

"Right," she said slowly, "Right." Phyllis shook her head, trying to shake off the moment and everything it represented. "Well, it's beautiful. I love it." She took it out of the box, laying it flat on the picnic table as she attempted to fasten it.

Seeing her struggle, Billy reached out to take her wrist. His hand touched hers and she stilled, the breath catching in her throat.

"Let me uh…Let me help you."

She nodded, not willing to trust her voice. The feeling of his skin on hers brought back the same feelings from the other night, the same doubts, the same questions. Looking at him now, she couldn't remember why she'd ever walked away.

* * *

Aly laid down as Billy tucked her in.

"Did you have fun tonight?" he asked.

Aly nodded. "Uh huh. Do you think Mommy liked her party and her presents?"

"I think she loved everything..just like she loves you." He smiled as he leaned down to kiss her forehead.

He turned towards the doorway as he heard Heather's soft footsteps. "Is it okay if I come say goodnight," Heather asked?

Aly nodded. She looked over at Billy. "We have to know when it's Heather's birthday so we can have a party too."

Heather smiled, her eyes flashing a bit of confusion as she looked over at Billy. "What's she talking about?"

Billy glanced down at Aly, who still beamed with pride. He couldn't be angry with her. There was nothing wrong with what she'd said. He hadn't asked her not to say anything and he never would. "We just had a little birthday party for Phyllis tonight at the park."

"Oh, I wish I'd known, I would have tried to come. Did you have a good turn out? It was a beautiful night for a party." Heather waited for his answer, bewildered by the faraway look in his eyes.

It certainly had been a beautiful night. His mind flashed back to the image of Phyllis smiling at him across the table, her head thrown back in laugher as Aly tried to throw grapes into his open mouth, her eyes gleaming at him as she opened her gift. He'd swear she simply got more gorgeous with each passing day.

"Billy!" Heather called his name again.

"Yeah," he said, suddenly realizing he'd been lost in his own memory. "We uh..we actually didn't invite anybody. It was just the three of us. It was really last minute."

He could see the look on her face, her displeasure obvious.

"I see," she said quietly. "Well." She smiled at Aly. "I bet that was really fun." She took a breath. "And I bet you're pretty tired, so we should let you get some sleep." She leaned down to kiss her. "You have everything you need?," Heather asked softly, determined not to let her anger with the situation impact her interactions with Aly.

"Can you hand me Wendy?" Aly asked with a yawn.

Heather looked over at Billy for a suggestion. Billy just shrugged.

"Who's Wendy, sweetie?"

"My unicorn," Ally muttered, "Mommy helped me name her after the girl in the bedtime book we read."

Billy reached for the unicorn and handed it to his daughter. His heart pounded as he looked at her. "Here you go," he whispered as he turned off the light.

* * *

Heather stepped out of the kitchen, drying off her hands with a towel. She'd decided to wait a bit to broach the subject, hoping instead that Billy would choose to talk to her. Surely he knew she deserved an explanation. Surely he understood a wife would find it strange that her husband would throw a birthday party for his ex-wife. She'd waited and waited for him to approach her, the resentment, anger, and suspicion building with each passing moment.

But now—she'd waited long enough. She watched him, his back to her as he sat still on the couch. He hadn't said a word since coming downstairs.

Billy stared straight ahead. He wasn't looking at anything in particular. The only thing that held his focus at the moment were the words his daughter spoke moments ago. She'd named the unicorn Wendy. That was no coincidence. She thought about it. She read their daughter the story—their story—the one they'd joked about in the very beginning of their time together. She still remembered. It was still real to her, just as it was for him.

"Billy."

He sat straight up as he heard her call his name.

"Yeah?"

"I think we need to talk," she said, talking a seat on the couch beside him.

Billy sighed. "Listen, Heather, if this is about the thing with Phyllis, I …I didn't mean to exclude you…I just.."

"You just kind of excluded everyone, didn't you?" She heard his exasperated sigh. "I'm sorry," she said softly. "I guess that was a little bitchy. I guess I'm just a little curious as to why you thought you needed to throw a private birthday party for your ex-wife."

He shook his head. "It wasn't about me. It was Aly's idea. She knew it was her Mom's birthday and she wanted to do something nice for her." That was true, to a degree. The only thing missing for his explanation of the events had been the fact that it was all his suggestion. From that point, Aly really had been insistent on the idea.

"So Aly came up with the idea?" Heather narrowed her eyes as she looked at him, "A four year old?"

"Well, I mean, I helped her with the planning, but the idea for the party was hers and the menu…chicken fingers, macaroni and cheese, grapes and juice." He smiled. "Trust me, Aly had her hands all over this."

Heather laughed a bit, feeling a bit silly. This was clearly not the romantic evening she'd been conjuring up in her head. "Oh," she breathed. "Hey, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to sound like one of those crazy, possessive, jealous women. I just…I know you and Phyllis really had something and sometimes that kind of thing is hard to let go of…especially when there's something that will always tie you together."

Billy nodded. "Yeah. I guess you're right."

Heather leaned in, kissing his cheek quickly before standing up. "But I should have known better. This was all about your daughter. You'd never use your daughter to spend time with your ex-wife. You're way too committed to your family for that."

Billy waited until he heard her moving in the kitchen again before he allowed himself to relax against the couch. She was right. He was committed to his family. The only problem was, in his heart—Phyllis would always be his family.


	5. Chapter 5

"Sweetie." Heather reached over, her head gently nudging Billy's bare chest. "Billy," she whispered, waiting until his eyes opened before she continued, "Aly's calling you."

Billy sat up, his eyes now open. Aly had been a remarkably good sleeper—even as a baby. She almost never woke up in the middle of the night and, even when she did, she almost never called out for anyone.

He stood, walking quickly down the hallway, his heart beating harder, somehow he instinctively knew that something was different—something was wrong.

"Aly," he said quietly, stepping into his daughter's darkened room. "You okay, baby?" He walked over to the lamp beside her bed, reaching under the shade and quickly flipping the switch. "Aly." He repeated, his voice now tinged with worry when she didn't respond.

The lamp cast just enough soft light across her small body for him to see the slight tremors that seemed to render her incapable of speaking. Sheer terror ripped through his body and he hit his knees in an instant, his hands cupping his daughter's small face.

"Heather!" he screamed.

She appeared in the open doorway, her eyes wide with worry. "What? What is it? What's wrong?"

"Call an ambulance," Billy said quickly.

* * *

Phyllis turned over in bed, her mind trying to process the strange sound. When Aly was home, she heard every noise, her body on full alert at all hours. Somehow though it seemed her brain knew when she was alone, allowing her body to drift into a deeper, more sound sleep.

The incessant noise continued to assault her dreams and she finally forced her eyes open, now recognizing the flashing screen of her phone. She reached over, grabbing it and bringing it to her ear. "Hello," she muttered, still feeling a bit out of it.

"Phyllis."

Her eyes flew open, his tone more sobering than anything ever could have been. "Billy," she breathed, her body trembling in fear. She knew. He wouldn't call for any other reason. "Aly," she managed.

"We're on our way to the emergency room now," he said as calmly as he could. "Is Mark there? Can he bring you?"

She was already out of bed, her hands rummaging through drawers grabbing the first pieces of clothing she could find. "Is she okay? I need you to tell me she's okay."

He could hear the panic in her voice and he understood it. It was taking everything he had to keep it together. They'd taken her in the ambulance, insisting he and Heather follow them in their car. Heather was driving, presumably so that he could call Phyllis, but in truth he wasn't sure he would have trusted himself behind the wheel.

"She's okay, I think. She's got a fever—it's high and she had a seizure or something. I don't know."

Phyllis gripped the bedpost, her legs suddenly feeling weak beneath her. "I'm on my way. You tell her that. You tell her I'm on my way."

Heather pulled into the emergency room parking lot as she looked over at Billy.

"Phyllis! Phyllis!" He pulled the phone away from his ear and sighed as he saw that the call had ended.

"What is it?" Heather asked, touching his arm gently.

"She shouldn't be driving. She doesn't need to be driving when she's this upset. I know her. Someone needs to get her. She can't…If anything…" His voice broke as the thought of losing her flashed though his mind. He couldn't handle it.

"It's okay," Heather said quietly. "She'll be okay. She's just thinking about her daughter now. That's what we all have to focus on."

* * *

Billy paced outside the door. "Why can't they tell us anything? She's just a little girl. What are they doing in there?"

Heather shook her head hopelessly. Even though she was standing right next to him, she might as well have been on the other side of the world. He wasn't talking to her. He wasn't leaning on her. She wasn't what he needed or wanted. His little girl was the only thing that could bring him any comfort tonight.

"Billy!" Phyllis' voice rang out through the busy waiting room.

Heather watched as he rushed to meet her, his arms wrapping around her instantly.

"Where is she?" she asked, the tears streaming down her face as she fought to control her breath.

He cupped her face in his hands as he looked into her eyes. He found some strange comfort in having her here. She was the one person in the world that could understand how terrified he was, the one person who could understand how much he loved that little girl.

"She's still in there," he said softly. "I don't know anything yet."

"She has to be okay, Billy. She just has to be." In any other situation, she probably would have thought more about being so openly affectionate with him, but right now she needed him. He was the only thing keeping her from collapsing into a heap on the floor.

"She's gonna be okay. She will. She's strong..just like you." He locked eyes with her again. "She is."

Heather stood back, saying nothing but watching them. She knew what everyone would say—how a crisis brings people together, how the way people act when their children are sick or injured doesn't mean anything. Of course they find comfort with each other now—that's only natural, only it didn't seem to be as much about Aly as it was about them. It was the look on her husband's face when he'd been worried about Phyllis' safety on the drive over. She wasn't sure she'd ever done anything to illicit that level of passion from him.

She took a breath, stepping over to them, nothing his hands still resting on her shoulders.

"Phyllis," she said softly, "Can I get you anything? Some coffee?"

"No. No. I couldn't."

Billy shook his head. "You should let her…maybe some herbal tea. It'll help settle your stomach."

Heather glanced down to see Phyllis' fist clenched above her abdomen.

"Just everything tonight or you're not feeling well?" Heather questioned.

"Stress. She always feels it in her stomach," Billy replied as if an old habit. He kept his eyes trained on Phyllis. "Let Heather get you some tea," he said softly, "It could be a while."

Phyllis nodded finally as she watched Heather head out towards the cafeteria.

"Come sit down." Billy took her hand and gently led her towards the chairs closest to the trauma entrance.

They both stopped short as the swinging doors opened. "Family of Aly Abbott?"

Phyllis felt her heart pounding as she gripped Billy's hand tight. She stepped beside her as she stood, staring at the doctor with terrified eyes.

"We're her parents," Billy said, his voice shaking a bit despite his efforts to put on a brave face.

"Mr. and Mrs. Abbott," the doctor began

Neither Billy nor Phyllis cared to correct him.

"I want to assure you that we are doing everything we can to get your daughter back in your arms. Right now, we're running some tests to try and determine the cause of Aly's high fever."

"What kind of tests?" Phyllis questioned, glancing up at Billy, her eyes still filled with worry.

The doctor sighed. "Well, we always want to start with the least invasive. The fact that her fever was so high gives me every indication that the seizure was in fact a febrile seizure. That's actually very good because it means we're probably not looking at any kind of epilepsy or anything neurological in nature. We will want to run some blood tests just to rule out any kind of infection. We'll take a lot at her white counts. We'll run some other simple tests—check for the flu, things like that. If all of that comes back normal, and if she's still exhibiting symptoms, then we might have to schedule a spinal."

Billy heard Phyllis' sharp intake of breath. "You really think that's necessary?" He moved his hand to wrap around her, pulling her closer to him. The fact that she needed him to be strong was helping him keep it together. He couldn't fall apart when he knew she was counting on him.

"It's hard to say," the doctor admitted with a compassionate sigh. "It all depends on the findings of these early tests. In my experience, however, it's always better to know what could happen. I don't like to spring things on people."

Phyllis let out a shaky breath. "Right. Is she okay? Can we see her?"

"Officially, No. We need her to rest and we don't allow visitors in the bays." He paused, looking quickly between Billy and Phyllis, "But unofficially—I've got a daughter about her age and I don't think a short visit will hurt anything." He smiled at their grateful expressions. "Just keep it brief, okay?"

Phyllis nodded as she quickly followed Billy into the bay.

Aly's eyes were closed as she lay in the hospital bed. Billy stopped, waiting for Phyllis to reach his side. He felt her shake with a stifled sob at the sight of her little girl hooked up to IVs and monitors. It was more than she could handle.

"She's okay," he whispered, wrapping his arms around her shoulders again. He closed his eyes as he felt her head fall against his chest. "She's okay," he repeated, realizing he needed to hear the words out loud.

"Aly," Phyllis reached out her hand, gently stroking her daughter's arm. "Aly. Baby. Mommy and Daddy are here."

Aly's eyelids fluttered before opening to look up at them.

Phyllis glanced over at Billy, her eyes brimming with tears.

"I'm sleepy," Aly whined, as she snuggled down against her pillow.

"That's okay," Billy whispered, leaning down to kiss her forehead. "You rest. We'll be here when you wake up, okay?"

He watched as the little girl nodded slightly.

Billy glanced back at Phyllis. "Maybe we should let her rest," he said softly.

"I don't want to leave her here alone, Billy." He could hear the desperation in her voice and see the fear in her eyes. "What if she wakes up alone? What if she's scared?"

The feeling of his hand on her back brought immediate comfort to her and she leaned back against him, needing to feel his strength.

"She's not alone," he whispered, "the doctors and nurses are here—and we'll be right outside if she needs us."

Phyllis sighed, relenting as she followed him from the room. Billy took a seat not letting go of her hand as he gently pulled her down in the chair next to him.

"She told me she was tired," she said in a whisperer after they'd sat in silence for a few minutes.

"What?"

"She said it—yesterday—she said she was tired. I didn't pay any attention. I thought she'd just played hard. I didn't take it seriously. If I'd just listened to her. If I'd taken her to the doctor…What kind of mother ignores their child?"

"Stop." Billy turned and looked at her with serious eyes. He could tell instantly where this was going. This was what Phyllis did when there was no one to blame—she blamed herself. This time, he couldn't let her.

"You didn't do anything wrong," he continued. "You're a good Mom. No, You're a great Mom. I have no doubt in my mind that you did everything right. There was no reason for you to think that there was anything wrong. You're here now. I know it and she knows it. That's what matters."

"I can't lose her, Billy. I can't. She's all I have left." She stopped herself then, afraid her pain and fear would betray her closely guarded heart.

"It's okay," he whispered, gathering her into his arms and allowing himself to relax against her body as she collapsed into his chest.

"Sorry to interrupt," Heather said quietly. She'd stood in the corner for a few minutes, sure they'd pull away after a moment, but it appeared they were both quite comfortable in their embrace.

"Oh," Phyllis pulled away quickly, wiping the tears from her face with her hand. She reached for the warm paper cup. "Thank you," she said quietly.

Heather nodded. "Of course. Is there any news?"

Billy shook his head. "They're still running tests. We got to go in and see her for a minute."

"Hopefully they'll have some answers soon," Heather breathed, turning her attention towards Phyllis, "Do you need me to call Mark for you?"

"Mark," Billy said flatly. "Right. Did you call him? I was hoping he'd drive you here. I really didn't want you driving yourself tonight."

"I called him, "Phyllis said, a little embarrassed to admit the state of her relationship, "He was in the middle of a meeting so I left word with his secretary. She said as soon as he came out, she'd let him know to come and meet me here."

Billy's eyes widened in amazement. "She couldn't interrupt him?"

"It's a really important deal," Phyllis explained. "I'm sure he'll be here soon."

"I'm sure he will." Billy reached out and squeezed her hand supportively.

All three turned at the sound of the door.

"Hey." Phyllis stood, walking over towards Mark who entered the room and stood still. "We were just talking about you."

Mark nodded, half heartedly pulling her into an embrace. "Have they told you anything yet?"

"No. We're still waiting." Phyllis watched him for a moment as he glanced around the room. "You okay? Did you need something?"

"I was just looking for somewhere I could plug in the laptop," he said. "Work doesn't stop you know."

Phyllis blinked, then turned and walked towards the window to look in on her daughter. She didn't have the time or the energy to waste on Mark tonight.

* * *

"Mr. and Mrs. Abbott?"

Billy and Phyllis both stood, meeting the doctor before he fully entered the waiting area.

The doctor smiled as he looked at them. "Good news," he said reaching out to clasp Billy's shoulder. "Aly's influenza swab came back positive. Her blood work all came back clean and within normal levels. We're going to keep her here for a little longer, get another bag of fluids in here, but after that you can take her home. All she'll need is rest, plenty of fluids, and some over the counter fever reducer."

Phyllis leaned against Billy for fear her body would betray her. The relief that flooded through her was almost overwhelming.

"Thank you," she whispered, tears streaming down her face. She watched as Heather approached Billy and wrapped her arms around him.

She stepped back a bit as she glanced over at the doctor who smiled before leaving the room. Making her way towards Mark, she noticed he was already packing up the laptop in his bag.

"The flu?" His tone was sharp and irritated. "I walked out on a multi-million dollar deal to come play hand holder because your daughter had the flu?"

"I.." She felt tears sting her eyes. His words were harsh but not entirely unexpected. "I'm sorry," she said quietly. "When I called, I didn't know what was going on. I thought it could be something really serious. I needed someone here with me."

"Yeah. I thought it was serious too. That's why I walked out on such an important meeting."

"I wouldn't have called if I'd known it was something this simple," she whispered, "I'm sorry…"

"Phyllis."

She stopped dead in her tracks as she heard Billy's voice and felt his presence coming up behind her.

"Is everything okay over here?"

"It's okay, Billy."

"Good," he said seriously, "Because it sounded like you were over here being asked to apologize for your daughter not being sick enough for you to warrant your boyfriend's support? And I was hoping that wasn't the case because what kind of arrogant, selfish, insensitive asshole would say something like that to a mother who just spent the last few hours in the hospital with their child?" His eyes flashed in anger at Mark.

"It's okay Billy. Really it is. Mark's just leaving. He had to walk out on a really important meeting to come here." She looked back at Mark. "You can go," she said quickly, "I'll call you later."

* * *

Billy pulled the bedroom door closed before climbing into bed beside Heather.

"It feels like this night has gone on forever, huh?" Heather sighed as she snuggled up against him.

"Yeah," he sighed, "I wanted to thank you for being okay with Phyllis staying here tonight. Both of us really wanted to be with Aly and she really wanted to have both of us here."

Heather nodded. "Sure. It's for Aly. She's what's important."

"That's what it is you know." Billy had been focused on keeping Phyllis calm tonight. Any free moment he'd had that hadn't been consumed with worrying about Aly had been spent worrying about Phyllis, but that didn't mean he'd missed the looks on Heather's face. "I know you're felt a little pushed aside tonight."

"Billy," Heather interrupted. She hated feeling jealous of the attention he gave his ex-wife when their daughter was in the hospital. What kind of a person does that?

"No really. I want you to understand. I care about Phyllis. I can't pretend that I don't, but I'm not with Phyllis. I'm with you. Tonight—I just needed to be there for her. She doesn't have anyone else."

"She has Mark."

"He's an ass," Billy said without any hesitation. "Anyone can see that. I hate the idea of him being there—of him being around my daughter. I absolutely hate it."

Heather thought for a moment. "Have you talked to Phyllis about it?"

Billy sighed. "No. Not yet, but I'm going to. After tonight, I feel like I have to. She deserves better than him. She deserves someone that loves her, someone that knows how wonderful she is, how special she is. She deserves someone that knows how lucky they are to have her in their life."

"You mean Aly, right?" Heather looked at him, watching his expression—the somber reality becoming all too clear.

"Yeah," he lied. "He should be so lucky to have her in his life and he doesn't even recognize it."


	6. Chapter 6

"Phyllis?" Billy leaned down lightly jostling her and watching as her eyes fluttered open.

She blinked, looking up at him, taking a few minutes to figure out exactly where she was and exactly what was going on. "Oh," she mumbled, clutching at the throw that was draped over her as she sat up. "Sorry. I guess I fell asleep here last night." She looked at the end of the couch, her heart pounding a bit. "Aly," she said, her hand immediately racing. "Where's Aly?"

He reached out, touching her arm gently. "She's fine," he whispered. "She's still sleeping. I just checked in on her. Her fever's still down."

"Oh," she sighed in relief. "I thought she was here with me last night." She shook her head. The craziness of the last few days had clearly given way to delusions now.

"She was," Billy replied. "You were both sacked out here on the couch when I went to bed last night. I picked her up and took her upstairs. You looked like you were comfortable enough. I hated to wake you. I know you're exhausted."

"You too." Her voice was soft as she reached up to touch his face, the gesture so instinctual that she didn't even think about it. Her eyes studied his. "You've got the dark circles under your eyes. You're not getting much sleep either, are you?"

He smiled, bringing his hand up to touch hers, "I'll be fine," he whispered. "Our girl is gonna be back to normal soon and I can catch up on my sleep then."

Phyllis nodded. "Right. Well, I think I can take her off your hands tonight. I definitely need to let you have your guest room…and your couch..back."

"You can stay as long as you like. Heather's fine with it. Aly loves having us all together."

"I know she does, but Billy—it's been three days." She looked up at him, her eyes telling the story. "You know this could confuse her. We don't want that."

Billy sighed. She was right. "At least stay for breakfast," he asked with a smile. "I can go get Aly—Heather's already cooking up a storm in the kitchen."

Phyllis smiled. "Sure. That sounds nice." She moved to stand, her leg giving out beneath her.

Billy's arms were around her quickly, his hands gripping her tiny waist just before she hit the ground.

"You okay?" He stared into her eyes as he pulled her up, his breath quickening as her body slid slowly against his.

"Yeah," she sighed. "Sleeping on the couch should definitely be reserved for college kids—my leg must have been asleep." Her face was still flushed at the feeling of his arms around her.

"Billy, Is Phyllis…" Heather stopped, her eyes staring at the sight of her husband with his arms around his ex-wife.

Phyllis stepped back. "Heather," she said quickly, looking at Billy for an assist. "Billy was just keeping me from being another hospital visit."

"She uh…she…her leg went to sleep and uh..she almost fell over when she stood up." He laughed nervously as he walked over to stand beside his wife. "Phyllis is gonna stay for breakfast."

"That's great," Heather said, forcing a smile. "Why don't you come help me get everything on the table?"

Billy nodded.

"I'll go get Aly," Phyllis offered.

* * *

Billy stepped into the kitchen behind Heather, already preparing for, what was sure to be, an uncomfortable conversation.

"Before you even start," Billy began.

"I'm not going to start, Billy," Heather said flatly, "Just tell me she's leaving today."

"She is," he said, trying not to sound as disappointed as he felt.

"Did you talk to her about Mark at all?"

He sighed. "I haven't. I haven't really found the right time yet. I just feel like I need to do it when we're alone. I think she might take it better that way."

Heather nodded. "Well, you're in luck. I don't know if you heard the doorbell or not while you were in the shower this morning, but the lawyer finally messengered over those papers about the title on the house. I need to go file them with the court. If you'll sign them really quick, I'll go do that and leave you here to have your conversation with her over breakfast."

He looked at her, a bit surprised at how easily she was agreeing to leave him here alone with Phyllis. Over the last few days, he knew she'd been uncomfortable with the way they were together, how close they were, the ease in which they still interacted.

"That would be great, really great." Billy kissed her cheek—feeling more than a little guilty for doubting her trust. "Things will calm down soon, I promise. It won't always be like this. Honestly, I think once you get to know Phyllis a little better, the two of you will really hit it off. We just all need to figure out how to be okay with each other. We're all connected because of Aly. She'll always be a part of our life."

* * *

"So, she can cook," Phyllis said with a smile, as she loaded dishes into the dishwasher. "Was that the draw?" Her infectious giggle echoed through the room as she watched the shocked look on his face.

"I…" he stuttered.

"I'm kidding, Billy."

"No, I know you are. I just…I don't really know how to answer that." He thought for a moment, realizing he might be being handed the perfect transition to the Mark conversation. "I mean…what drew you to Mark?"

Phyllis stopped, suddenly turning to look at him. "Mark? What brought him up?"

"Well—I was just thinking about your question. I chose Heather for a lot of different reasons. We could talk, she got along with Aly…" He stopped, hesitating, not wanting to continue talking about Heather with her. "I was just wondering what made you choose Mark. Based on what I've seen, he's not very…"

"Very what?" Phyllis snapped, suddenly feeling rather defensive.

"Look, don't act like it didn't happen, Phyllis. The way he acted at the hospital the other night. He hasn't stopped by to check on Aly…has he even called?"

"That's none of your business," she snapped.

"Like hell it isn't. He's in your life which means he's in Aly's life and anything that involves her is most certainly my business."

"That's not what this is about and you can stop pretending it is." Phyllis shut the dishwasher hard. He followed her as she stormed out of the kitchen. "Aly," she called, gently touching her daughter's soft hair as she sat on the couch. "We're gonna have to finish the movie at our house. It's time to go. I'm gonna go grab your bag. Why don't you put on your shoes, okay?"

She headed up the stairs, hearing Billy's footsteps fast behind her. "You can stop now, Billy. I'm not interested in hearing anymore of this."

"Phyllis—I didn't mean to upset you. I just..I just don't want you to settle for someone that…"

"Settle?! Is that what you think? You think because I'm not with you that anything else is just settling?" She laughed a bit manically. "That's some ego you've got there. You listen to me. I chose Mark because Mark was what I wanted. You have your opinions of him and that's fine but what you think of him means nothing to me."

She headed down the stairs to find Aly standing with shoes on and her DVD in hand. "Tell Daddy goodbye, sweetie."

Billy leaned down to kiss his daughter, standing to flash concerned eyes at Phyllis as she turned towards the door. "Call me later?"

"Don't wait up," she snapped.

He sighed as he watched the door close.

* * *

"You didn't have to do this," Phyllis said as she held her wine glass out for him to pour.

"Yes, I did," Mark said quietly, glancing over at Aly who lay on the couch watching her movie. "I feel terrible about how I acted the other day. I was totally stressed out over work and I completely took it out on you."

"It's okay," she sighed. "Emotions were running high for everyone."

"No, it's not okay. That's why I wanted to do this—the wine, the flowers, the takeout, and even more importantly, what's not here—no phone, no laptop." He pulled her hand to his lips, kissing it gently. "Just us."

Phyllis smiled, wishing these moments were more frequent. No one saw this Mark—the one that doted on her and made her feel so special.

The sound of the knock on the door interrupted the moment. She grinned at him. "What did you do?"

Mark held his hands up in innocence. "I didn't do anything, I swear." He walked to the door, opening it, quickly signing the papers, and closing it before walking back into the room.

"Who was it?" Phyllis asked.

"Messenger service," Mark said, holding out an envelope. "Papers for you—were you expecting anything?"

Phyllis shook her head as she reached for the papers and carefully began to read. Her eyes widened, tears building as her cheeks flushed with rage.

She flipped the pages quickly, her voice shaking as she finally looked up. "Can you watch Aly for me please? I won't be long."

* * *

"Hey," Billy stood, walking over to the door. "Where have you been? I was beginning to get a little worried. I know you said you were dropping off those papers, but I didn't realize you'd be gone all day."

Heather hesitated before walking into the room any further. "Sorry. I didn't mean to worry you. I was just trying to get a few things taken care of." It was done now. There was nothing left to consider—nothing left to worry about. She just needed to tell him.

Billy watched her face, the myriad of expressions confusing him. "Heather," he began, "Is something wrong?"

"Why don't you sit down? We need to talk."

Billy nodded, sitting back down on the couch and waiting for Heather to sit down next to him.

"Before I tell you this," she started, "I want you to know that I only did this to make things better…to make our life better. I'm not trying to hurt anybody."

"What are you talking about?"

She shook her head, trying to determine how to even begin. "These few days, watching you with Aly, and with…with Phyllis, I realized that our family would never live up to the same standard as you had with her."

"That's not true, Heather. Phyllis and I are just friends and we…"

"You're Aly's parents. You said it yourself this morning. As long as Phyllis is Aly's mother, she'll always be a part of our lives."

Billy nodded slowly. "Right…and Phyllis will always be Aly's mother."

Heather looked at him for a long moment. "Maybe not."

Billy jumped, the sound of frantic knocking startling them both. "What in the world?" He stood, moving towards the door. Heather jumped up quickly, grabbing his arm. "Wait, Billy—Let me tell you this first. I need to be the one to tell you."

"Billy! You better open this damn door or I swear to God I will break it down!"

Billy looked back at Heather, hearing Phyllis' voice through the still-closed front door. "What the hell did you do, Heather?"

She said nothing, simply watching as he opened the door, her eyes falling on Phyllis' face.

Phyllis took a step inside, her hands trembling as she gripped the papers. She could feel the tears streaming down her face, but she no longer cared to wipe them away. A part of her was so hurt she could barely look at him. Never in a million years did she imagine he would stoop to this level. The other part of her was consumed with a rage she couldn't quantify. The idea that anyone, especially someone that knew her as well as Billy did, would question her in this way made her furious.

"Phyllis…what's the matter?" He reached out his hand to her, his instinct to comfort her impossible to quell. The thought entered his mind. "Aly? Is it Aly?"

She shoved him hard and, were it not for the sofa behind him, he might have ended up on the floor. "How the hell can you even look at me in the eyes and ask me about her?"

He could see the fury in her eyes and he glanced back at Heather, fearful her behavior was somehow connected to Phyllis' mood.

"I don't understand," he said, righting himself. "Please, just tell me what's going on. Tell me why you're so upset."

"Damn it, Billy! Don't act like this is some joke! Do you have any idea what this is going to do to her? To me? Do you even care?" She thrust the papers at him and he took them, his eyes quickly searching the pages.

His eyes met hers. "I don't know what this is…I don't know where this came from…" He reached out again. "Phyllis, You know me. I'd never…"

"Save it, Billy. So what? I didn't jump when you said jump this morning. I didn't agree to get rid of Mark to satisfy your whim and you decide to try and take my daughter away from me?" The tears fell faster now and her breathing became more erratic. "Sole custody? I just never thought you would do this…I never thought you would…" Her voice broke.

Billy grabbed her shoulders, looking deep into her eyes, his own eyes now wet with tears. "I wouldn't. I wouldn't. I swear. I know how much you love Aly..how much she loves you..I'd never do anything to get in the way of that." He shook his head, his mind racing, trying to decide how this could happen.

"Your signature is on the papers, Billy. You signed them. How do you explain that?" She wanted to believe him, need to, desperately. His eyes started into hers, their desperation and sincerity so real and poignant she almost couldn't stand it.

She watched in silence as realization settled in his eyes. He turned, his movements slow but deliberate. He stopped in front of Heather, his shoulders rising and falling with a deep breath. "You did this, didn't you?"

* * *

Phyllis stepped up beside him, Heather's silence and horrified expression providing all the answer she needed.

"Heather," Billy repeated, "Tell me what you did."

"I wanted it to be our family. She's such a beautiful little girl, but the two of you together." She looked at them—even now they seemed inseparable. "I can't compete with that."

"So you thought you could just do what? Cut me out? Take my daughter?" Phyllis trembled at the absurdity of the situation. "What the hell is the matter with you?" She raised her hand to grab her and Billy quickly stepped in front.

"Hold on," he whispered.

He turned back to look at his wife. "Why? Why would you do this? You know how much Aly loves her. Forget about me and Phyllis. Did you even think about what this might do to Aly? Losing her mother like this?"

"Aly would be fine. I'd be a great mother to her."

"You are not her mother!" Phyllis screamed. "You will never be her mother and let me tell you something—if you ever use my daughter to try and solidify whatever the hell this is again…I swear…"

"Phylllis..Phyllis…" She kept her eyes on Heather as she felt Billy's hands on her shoulders, gently pushing her out the room. She still trembled in anger as she felt his arms wrap around the back of her neck, the gentle kneading of his fingertips bringing a bit of relief to her.

"Listen to me," he whispered, "I promise you….I promise you, I'll fix this. First thing in the morning, I'll call the lawyer and I'll explain what happened. I'll get this whole mess thrown out, okay? I swear. I would never do that to you." He pulled her into his arms, holding her for a moment as he felt her sobbing subside.

"You okay?" he asked as she pulled away.

She nodded. "I'm gonna go. You probably need some time."

"Yeah," he sighed. "I've got to handle this." He shook his head. This was far worse than any scenario he ever could have imagined. A betrayal like this was beyond forgiveness. Messing with his life was one thing, interfering with his daughter's potential happiness was another thing entirely.

"You gonna be okay to drive?"

"Yeah," she said quietly, "I'll be fine."

He walked her to the door, watching from the window as she drove away. Slowly he turned around to face Heather.

"I don't know what to say," she whispered, starting to walk towards him.

"That's because there's nothing to say," he said, his face devoid of emotion. "You've got nothing left to say that I want to hear."


	7. Chapter 7

Billy leaned back in his desk chair with a frustrated sigh. He'd been looking at the same sketch for nearly an hour and he still was no further along in his creative process than he had been when he'd started. Victoria was, no doubt, already putting the finishing touches on her pitch and he couldn't even come up with a solid campaign. It was hard enough to come up with ideas for a cosmetic company when you couldn't directly relate to the products, it was even more difficult when the women in your life served as more distraction than inspiration. He ran his hands over his face, his mind flashing back to the night a few weeks before…

* * *

 _She was sitting on the couch when he finally came back down the stairs. "Billy," she breathed. "I'm so glad you're back. I really want to talk about this. We have to talk about this. Please believe me…I was just trying to make things better. I did this for us."_

 _"You were trying to make things better for you. You never once considered how this would impact my daughter, me, Phyllis—the only thing you were concerned with was yourself." Billy knew his words were harsh, but he couldn't feel guilty about saying them. He was so angry he could barely even look at her. How could he have been so wrong about someone?_

 _"Ok. Yes. You know what—you're right. I was thinking about myself, but not because I didn't care about anything else. It was because I cared so much—because I wanted this to work so badly. You don't think I saw it—the way you looked at her, the way you talked about her? It was like she was some sort of mythical creature, some kind of fairy tale version of perfection that I'd never be able to compete with."_

 _Billy shook his head. "I can't be responsible for your deranged paranoia. I married you for God's sake. What more did you need, how much more proof could I possibly have given you to show you I was ready to move on? I introduced you to my daughter. I would never have done that if I wasn't serious about this."_

 _"I know that and I believe you did want to move on, but you couldn't as long as Phyllis was everywhere—that's why I did this and I knew this would be good for you too. This was partly what you wanted…"_

 _His eyes flashed in anger. "What I wanted?! Where the hell do you come up with something like that?"_

 _"You said it. You said you hated that Mark was around your daughter. You told me you wished you could talk to Phyllis about it but that you were afraid she wouldn't take it well. This would have been the answer. We could have given her a great life and maybe at some point, Phyllis could have been a part of her life."_

 _"Part of her life? She's her mother, Heather. She's a damn good mother!"_

 _Heather sighed. "So you keep saying. In fact, to hear you talk, Phyllis is good at everything. She's perfect. I can't figure out why you're not with her. She's clearly the standard by which all women are measured in your eyes."_

 _Billy stood up, stomping across the room and standing with his back to her. "I don't get you. I really don't. You do something like this and claim it was to make things better for us and yet things were okay. I don't know what happened. What did I do, Heather?" He turned around to face her, his eyes pleading. "What did I do that made you do this? What didn't I give you?"_

 _She took a shaky breath, standing up and walking the length of the room to stand in front of him. "That's just it, Billy. All you ever had to give me was your heart, but you couldn't do it—you couldn't do it because it belongs to someone else—whether you know it or not, whether you admit it or not. Phyllis still has your heart."_

* * *

Billy shook his head, still staring down at the sketch. It was useless. He opened his desk drawer, his eyes quickly falling on the framed photo that lay inside. It was the same mother of pearl frame he and Phyllis had picked out when they were registering for gifts. She'd said then it would be perfect for their wedding photo. She was right. Looking at the picture now, he could still remember how happy they'd been—how he wished he could find that happiness again. That was why he'd remarried so quickly and, in truth, why it had ended in an annulment. Heather was never going to replace Phyllis. No one would. No one ever could. He felt the tears begin to sting at his eyes and he drew in a long breath. He placed the ad sketches underneath the frame, closing the drawer hard.

For the last few minutes he'd been able to hear the slow rolls of thunder echoing outside the windows. If he left now, maybe he could beat the storm home. He reached for his coat and headed towards the door. As he reached for the light switch, the power went out.

* * *

Billy walked down the stairs, making slow progress in the pitch dark stairwell. He finally reached the door that led to the floor for Jabot. His mind instantly flashed to thoughts of her. There was no reason she'd be there, but somehow he had to check. No matter what, she would always be someone he needed to protect. It was instinctual—as much a part of him as blinking and breathing. He pushed open the door, walking through the darkened hallway.

* * *

Phyllis huffed. She loved working late like this, these were the times she could actually catch up on work. She didn't have to worry about Ashley. She didn't have to contend with Jack. She didn't even have to deal with Ravi and his crazy, complicated tech mind. All she had to do was work. Working was hard to do in the dark.

She pushed open the door, glancing down the dark hallway as she held the flashlight in her hand. "Batteries," she muttered, "It only works with batteries." Carefully she stepped towards the end of the hall, her mind tracing the well known route to the supply closet. She stilled at the sound of footsteps.

"Who's there?" she hissed, grabbing the flashlight and brandishing it like a weapon. "Look, you might as well leave. The security guard is just down the hall. He'll be back in just a minute."

Billy smiled upon hearing her voice. "I don't that. Dave's got book club tonight. He's excited too. He's hosting…who knew he could bake?"

He heard her relieved sigh before he got close enough to see her face. "You okay?" he asked once he finally reached her.

"Yeah, I'm okay. Just a little ticked off that a place of this size can't invest in a proper generator." She smiled at him.

"I know, right?" He shrugged, "So—you still like working late to catch up I see. What are you doing out here?"

"I'm looking for batteries for this," she said, holding up the flashlight, "If I can find some then at least I can see my way down the stairs—make it down to the parking structure with my ankles in one piece."

"Are you crazy?" Billy shook his head. "Have you heard the wind howling out there? You can't go out in that. It's not safe. We need to just stay here and ride this out. Aly's with my Mom today. She'll be fine."

"Billy, we don't have anything here. We don't have anything to eat, nothing to drink, not to mention the fact that this big, old building is gonna get pretty cold in a bit with no power. It's not gonna be some fun camping experience."

It was dark, but the light from the exit signs provided just enough light for her to see the mischievous twinkle in his eyes. "I think we'll be fine. We're both pretty resourceful. I seem to remember the last time the power went out we kept warm with a bottle of wine and an old rocking chair."

She sighed, nodding slowly. "Yeah, well. Things are a little different now." She stopped, thinking a moment before walking back into her office. "Although," she opened her desk, reaching in and pulling out a bottle. "I happen to have some wine here."

Billy laughed softly. "What are you doing with wine at the office?"

"Well, you never know when Ashley or Jack will cause me to pop the cork. It's been known to happen."

"I suppose," he grinned. "I guess now all we have to do is find some food."

* * *

"Jackpot!"

Billy appeared in the doorway, his eyes wide with curiosity. "What'cha got?"

"Family size bag of M&Ms," she grinned, holding up the find. "And what appears to be a half eaten granola bar." Her nose wrinkled as she checked the package. "I don't think we're quite that desperate yet."

"Nah," he sighed. "Let's keep looking."

"Nothing in the offices down the hall?" she asked.

"I did find these." Billy held up a deck of cards. "Thought they could come in handy later if uh..boredom sets in."

Phyllis narrowed her eyes. "You're not allowed to gamble," she chided.

"Who said anything about gambling," he smiled. "I was thinking maybe we play a different way." He laughed as he saw the look of surprise flash in her eyes and the tint of color in her cheeks. "I'm kidding," he breathed.

"No you're not," she said quickly, playfully jabbing at him as she brushed past him to head back into the hall.

"You're right. I'm not."

* * *

"Alright, let's take a look here. I think we've got a pretty impressive spread here. Chocolate, trail mix, beef jerky, fruit snacks, chips, and some bottled water." Billy nodded as he put the items back on the desk.

"And the wine," Phyllis added. "Can't forget that."

"Right, the wine," he said, looking up at her. "You want to crack that open and get started?"

"Wait a minute. You never told me what you were doing here…"

"Oh..well, I was trying to make some progress on the ad campaign for the new cosmetics line. Victoria is way ahead of me on this one and the female psyche has never been something I've mastered very well, so…" He smiled as he watched her nod in agreement. "Anyway, my sketches are a bit of a disaster."

"Well, you happen to have a captive, female audience right here and I'd be happy to take a look at them for you if you want to walk up to your office."

"You want to help me with the Brash and Sassy campaign? You're the competition?"

"Oh, come on." Phyllis looked at him, her face softening a bit. "I can put that aside if you can."

* * *

"Alright," Phyllis quipped, walking into the lab. "Where's this impossible ad campaign."

"It's in my office—in my desk," Billy said, opening the door, surprised as she snuck in front of him, standing in front of the desk with her arms blocking his access to the drawer.

"Oh no you don't." She grinned in defiance as jostled for position. "If anyone has premium junk food in this office, it's you Billy Abbott and I'm going to get first dibs." She turned quickly, a victorious smile planted on her face as she pulled open the drawer.

"Phyllis," he protested. "Don't…"

She stopped, her hands trembling as she lifted the frame.

He watched her as she slowly turned to face him, her eyes already glistening with the possibility of tears. "What is this?" she asked.

"You don't know."

She sighed, the shaky sigh that usually meant she was trying not to get too upset. "Of course I know what it is—I guess what I mean is…why is it here? Why do you have it in your desk?"

"I just forgot it was in there," he lied. "I normally don't work over here. That's why I was trying to stop you. I don't work at this desk that much. That picture's been in there for months."

"Oh, I see." She turned back to the drawer, reaching for the file that sat underneath it. "So, this isn't the ad campaign you're working on?" She lifted the file, showing it to him, her eyes telling him quite clearly that she knew better—that his lies were lost on her.

"Okay—you're right…it is." He sat down in the chair, not knowing where to start. "I knew the picture was there. I look at it sometimes…" That was a lie, he thought to himself. What was the point now? "I look at it a lot…all the time."

Silence fell over the room for a moment as she allowed his words to sink in. "Why?" she finally managed the word summing up all the questions in her head as best she could.

"Memories, I guess. I mean—isn't that why we took the picture then—so we'd always remember the moment? So we'd always remember how happy we were right then in that moment? We didn't want to forget then and I don't want to forget now."

* * *

"You're kind of quiet." Billy looked at her as she sat there, her back leaning against the side of her desk. "Look, if you're upset about what I said earlier—up in my office—I'm sorry. I didn't mean to push you or say anything that upset you. I just…I'm tired of pretending that I don't feel things…"

Phyllis looked up at him. "No, it's not that. I'm not upset with you for being honest. I always want you to be honest. I just don't know what to say to you right now. I didn't know you thought about it…about us. I think I was…" She stopped as she saw his eyes light up.

"You think about us?" he said quietly. "You think about the way it was?"

She smiled. "Of course I do. How could I not. We had some amazing times together and nothing changes that."

"That's true."

A loud boom of thunder rang out through the building and Phyllis jumped. "It must be getting pretty bad out there. Looks like we're not going to be getting the power back anytime soon."

"Certainly doesn't sound like it." Billy grabbed the snacks from the desk and brought them over the area where they sat. "What's your pleasure?"

"I'll start with the trail mix," she said, catching the bag as Billy tossed it to her. "Not sure that'll go with the wine, but we'll give it a shot."

"Once you have a few more glasses, you won't notice as much," he quipped as he sat back down, throwing a handful of M&Ms into his mouth. "You know, maybe storms are kind of our thing," he smiled. "I seem to remember another storm that was pretty significant for us." He looked at her, his own smile growing larger as he saw her eyes flicker.

"Oh God—yeah, I remember…that was a crazy, crazy night.."

* * *

 _"Everything is going to be fine. I promise."_

 _Phyllis groaned in a mix of frustration, panic, and pain. The rain pelted down on the hood of the car and she felt the strength of the wind as they swayed back and forth. "I hear you, Billy," she managed, her breathing labored, "but this does not look fine to me. The power is out all over the city. The traffic lights are out. Look at that line of traffic. We're never gonna make it there in time."_

 _"Yes, we will," he repeated, reaching out and gripping her hand. "The traffic will clear and we'll get to the hospital where they will have generator and everything will be okay. All you need to focus on is breathing and staying calm."_

 _"Billy," she yelped as another contraction hit. "I don't want to have this baby in the backseat. This is just like those tv shows you know. We're gonna end up on the side of the road using some tow truck drivers jean jacket as a baby blanket and a shoe string to tie off the umbilical cord."_

 _He couldn't help but smile at her creative nightmare scenario. "I promise you—that will not happen." Gently he stroked her hair as he finally felt her relax against the headrest. "You okay?"_

 _She nodded. "I'm scared, Billy," she whispered. "I just wanted this baby to be born in a hospital to a mother and father that were married. I just wanted to see what normal felt like for once."_

 _"Hey," he whispered. "Normal is so overrated. Normal is for ordinary people and you, Phyllis Abbott, you are extraordinary."_

* * *

Phyllis smiled as she thought back to that night. "I don't know what I would have done without you," she sighed. "I was terrified, but not you." She looked at him, her eyes locking with his. He had always been her safe place to fall. When she fell apart, her was her strength. When she needed somewhere to run, he was her haven, when she was at her going crazy, he was the sanity. If ever there was someone that completed her—it was him.

"You never wavered," she said quietly. "You were calm and so sure that everything was going to be fine."

"Are you kidding?" He shook his head as he poured more wine into her glass. "I was terrified. I had no idea what was going to happen. I didn't know if the traffic was going to clear. I didn't know if we would make it to the hospital. I didn't know if we'd be able to find someone to help us if we couldn't. I was going out of my mind. All I could think about was that I had to keep you calm because I couldn't let you see that I was afraid."

"I had no idea." She sat quietly for a moment, wondering how many times he'd silently accepted burdens without her knowledge. "But you were right," she finally continued, "We did make to the hospital and she was fine. She's better than fine. She's perfect."

"She is," he breathed. "I can't imagine my life without her."

Phyllis ran her hands up her arms, the chill in the room now truly beginning to settle in.

"You cold?"

"Yeah, the temperature must be really dropping out there. It's getting chilly in here." She glanced down at her watch. "I didn't realize how late it was. We should probably try and get some sleep."

"Yeah—Yeah, we should." He stood, placing the glasses and the rest of the food back on top of the desk. "You know there's a couch in the lounge. Why don't you take that and you can take my coat. That should be enough to keep you pretty warm."

"But what about you? It's too cold to be sitting in here all night—especially without a coat, Billy."

"I'll be fine," he said quickly. "I won't be able to sleep thinking about you somewhere shivering." He followed her into the lounge as he handed her the coat and watched her sit on the small sofa. "You think you'll be okay in here?" he asked.

"Yeah..I think I'll be fine, but.." She looked up at him for a moment. "Why don't you stay here too."

He blinked for a moment, wondering if he'd heard her correctly. "Stay here with you?"

"It's already cold and it's gonna get colder. If we both sleep here, we can both cover with the coat and it makes more sense." She could see the hesitation on his face. "Billy—really—it's okay."

"Alright," he breathed, taking a seat on the couch and carefully spreading the coat across the both. "We don't have to worry about turning off the lights at least, huh?"

He felt her body shake with a small laugh and he sighed. It was strange, being here like this with her. He wanted to touch her, but he knew he couldn't, or at least he shouldn't. She was so close to him, so close he could feel her chest rise and fall as she took each breath. The warmth of her body seemed to spread through him and he felt both relaxed and exhilarated by her proximity. He sat like this for a several minutes, until her rise and fall of breath settled into a rhythmic pattern—the pattern he knew usually signified sleep.

Carefully he lifted his arm, feeling her body move against his, her head falling against his chest, her hand wrapping naturally around his waist. He let his arm fall across her back, her body now snuggled tight against his. With that, he finally closed his eyes and allowed himself to sleep.

* * *

6:03—that was the time his watch said from what he could tell. He'd been awake for what he imagined to be about half an hour but he'd been afraid to move, afraid to disturb the closest thing to perfection he'd experienced in months. Her face was completely relaxed, her hair wild and falling across her face. She was a vision and, at least for the moment, she was totally and completely his. He felt her stir, his eyes immediately focusing on her face. His lips twitched, as if she was trying to say something in her still groggy state. "Billy," she mumbled.

It was probably his immediate, sharp intake of breath that woke her, but he couldn't keep from reacting to the shock of her words. She'd called his name. Her eyes opened quickly and she pulled away, the morning sun now casting light throughout the room. "Billy," she repeated, now completely awake and aware. "I was…I think maybe…I think you might have been there in a dream I was having."

"Oh, really?" He didn't want to embarrass her. He didn't want to do anything that could taint the night they'd had.

"Yeah." She sat up straight. "Oh God," she yelped, glancing around the room hurriedly, "Are people here?"

"No. Nobody's here yet." He touched her arm softly, trying to keep her from rushing away. "It's early..just after six. We still have time." Gently, he pulled her back down to the sofa to sit beside him. His eyes stared into hers. "Phyllis," he said softly, "About last night…about what happened."

She ran her hands over her face. "Billy." Her eyes softened as she looked at him, the hope in his eyes both touching her heart and terrifying her. "Last night was…"

"Amazing," he offered.

"It was," she said quietly, "but it was also not reality. It's great to remember the way it was and we should do that. It's important that we remember the good times we had, but it's also important that we can move on…that we can focus on new things…that we can forget about what we used to be and try and find a new normal for us."

"What?" He could barely believe what he was hearing. "You were the one that told me that I've been there for you…you said you thought about us all the time. You said that."

"I know..and I do, but I'm trying not to. I'm trying to move on, Billy and, while I'll never forget you and I'll never stop caring about you, I need to forget us—I need to forget the way it was between us."

He stood up, his heart now pounding in his chest. He wanted to scream, to cry, to throw something, but he couldn't. Instead he walked over to her, gently taking her hands in his. "Okay," he said quietly. "If that's what you want, that's fine, but there's just one thing I need to do. It's something I've wanted to do for a while and I need to do it now…"

She stood, staring at him, her eyes showing her confusion.

Before she had a chance to speak, his lips captured hers. His hands raked through her hair as he held her tight against him. For a fraction of a second, he'd been afraid she'd resist, but he soon realized she was kissing him back and he allowed it to continue for a moment before finally pulling away.

After taking a breath, he finally took in her stunned expression. "Try to forget about that," he said quietly, flashing a smile at her before walking out of the room.


	8. Chapter 8

"You're still here?" Lauren poked her head into Phyllis' office. "I thought you'd have headed out by now. What are you working on? Is there a problem with the app?"

Phyllis sighed. "No. It's nothing like that. I've just not had the most productive day, that's all."

Lauren tilted to the side a bit, hesitating, waiting for her friend to continue. "Anything you need to talk about?" she prodded.

She lifted her head. Lauren already had her coat on, her briefcase tucked snug under her arm. She didn't need to hear her problems. "No," she sighed. "I'm fine. You go. I won't be long."

"Only if you promise you're not going to be here burning the midnight oil."

Phyllis nodded. "Promise." She kept the smile plastered on her face until Lauren disappeared from her view.

The last thing she wanted to do was spend her night at the office. It was hard enough to keep the thoughts of him out of her mind. She replayed the moment over and over again. She could see him standing by the desk, she could hear his deep, warm voice as she walked down the hall, and she didn't even go into the lounge anymore. She couldn't.

He had moved on, regardless of how it had turned out. He had made that choice. He had found someone else. She had to do the same. She had to try. Mark was good for her. He was different and that was precisely what she needed—something new, something different, something completely unlike anything she'd ever had before.

Phyllis closed her laptop, drawing in a deep breath as she placed her hands flat on the desk in front of her. Yes, she thought to herself, she would commit to this relationship, to giving it an honest try—and that all started with tonight.

* * *

Phyllis paced around the room nervously, holding the phone to her ear. "And you're sure everything's okay?" She smiled as she listened to the voice on the other line. In the background she could hear Aly's musical laughter. "Well- It certainly sounds like she's having a great time. Alright then—Of course. I'll give you a call tomorrow afternoon to see when I should pick her up. Give me a call if anything comes up." She placed the phone on the dresser and turned around, making a few final touches to the spread across the table.

She'd gone by two different gourmet shops and three different bakeries to get all of Mark's favorites. Tonight needed to be special. She'd even managed to find a bottle of his favorite wine. After talking to his secretary, and learning he didn't have any late meetings tonight, she knew it almost had to be a sign and she'd thrown her into the elaborate preparations. All that was left to do now was wait on him to arrive.

* * *

He never liked fighting with her, no matter what it was about. It didn't matter if he was in the right or not, seeing her upset was never something that seemed worth it. Sometimes he wondered if he should have fought her more when it came to the divorce—if the fact that he gave in too easily made her think he didn't care. He supposed it didn't matter much now.

Their divorce had been an amicable one, with him going along with anything and everything she wanted—except for one thing.

Billy sat down on the couch as he looked around the empty living room. Somehow it seemed even bigger now and far, far more quiet. Too quiet. He never wanted this house.

 _He stared at her across the mahogany table._

 _"Maybe we should get lawyers, Billy. We can do that if it will make things easier." Phyllis looked at him for a moment, her eyes more sad than angry._

 _"Is that what you want?" He wanted to hear her say no—to say that none of this was what she wanted. He prayed that she'd come to her senses and realize that all of this was just a rash reaction to his stupid decision._

 _"Billy," she breathed. "You know I don't want to bring lawyers into this, and I didn't think we needed to. I mean we can agree on Aly. She's the most important thing. The house shouldn't be a big deal."_

 _"It's our house, Phyllis. It'll always be our house."_

 _"No, it won't." He could see the tears in her eyes. His hand twitched, almost involuntarily reaching out to touch hers, but that wasn't his place anymore. "It's not ours anymore. The only thing that's ours is our daughter."_

 _"Then live there with her—let it be her house."_

 _"I can't, Billy. I can't be in that house day in and day out. I can't live with those memories every single day. Don't you get that? We can sell it. If you want, we can put the money in a trust for Aly, or we can split the money and both use it for our separate expenses….whatever you want."_

 _He felt a lump rise in his throat and he swallowed hard in an attempt to be able to speak. "You want to sell it?"_

 _"It's the only thing the makes sense."_

 _"You want other people to live in the house we built for us? For our family?" He shook his head, unwilling to even consider it. "What if I live there? What if I live in the house?"_

Billy stood up, walking over the mantle, his eyes staring that the abstract piece of art that now hung over the fireplace. It was something Heather had chosen—one of the first things they'd changed when she'd moved in.

It replaced the family photo, the one they'd had taken when Aly had just turned 2. He could still see it in his mind, just as vivid as it would be if it still hung there today. Billy took a deep breath, turning and grabbing his coat. Tonight, forgetting was proving to be a stubborn problem.

* * *

"I'm really sorry you went through all this trouble, sweetie."

"Mark, I called your office. Your secretary said you didn't have any meetings tonight." Phyllis followed him out of the room as he walked over to the coat closet to choose a different jacket.

Mark sighed. "I know—She can't keep anything straight. I'm going to have to replace her." He shook his head.

"Can't you just put it off—just for one night? I've got all this food here? I got all your favorites?" She reached out to touch him, turning him to face her. "Please, Mark. I don't ask for much."

He saw the look in her eyes and for a moment, he felt a twinge of guilt. "Tell you what," he said, softening his voice a bit, "I'll call and see if I can make the meeting a little later, okay?" He flashed a smile at her, stepping out the room quickly.

Phyllis stood, waiting, hearing his hushed voice as he made the call. Her eyebrows raised as he entered. "Well?"

"I've got thirty minutes," he said smiling.

"Thirty minutes?" Her face fell as she looked at him, stunned he thought this would pacify her. "That's what I get? Thirty minutes?"

"Sweetie…this is a really important meeting. Thirty minutes is the best I can do tonight."

"Okay," she relented. "I just…I was hoping to talk to you..it's important."

Mark sat down, quickly opening the wine and pouring two glasses. He reached out for some food before sitting down and placing a glass in front of her plate. "So sit down," he smiled, gesturing to the empty chair, "and talk."

"I was just thinking about us and about our relationship."

"That sound ominous," he grinned, "I'm not getting the brush off here, am I?"

"No. Nothing like that—actually the opposite of that. I was wondering what you were thinking about future plans…you know if you ever thought about us maybe…getting married?"

The breath left his lips in a quick spurt. "Married?" he laughed. "Sure it's something I think about and yes I'd love to do that, but it's not the right time of course…?"

"Not the right time?" She paused a minute, looking at him with confused eyes. "Why isn't it the right time? I mean if we want to having a life together and maybe have a family…"

"A family?" Mark's eyebrows raised sharply. "You want a family now, too? You already have a kid. Why do need another?"

"Uh..I thought we could have a child together…" She leaned back in her chair, trying not to be hurt by his tone. "You don't want to have children?"

"I'm not saying never, but I certainly don't have time for that right now. I don't have time for anything right now. With business the way it is, I can't even think about a wedding, much less kids." Mark shrugged, not quite sure how these wouldn't be obvious concepts.

"So you're saying you wouldn't even consider putting your career on the backburner for us..for a family?" Her eyes welled up with tears. His words were hurtful, but in truth, not necessarily surprising. She'd known this for a while now, but somehow she'd been able to deny the truth. She'd been denying the truth about a lot of things.

He reached out, grabbing a few crackers in his hand before standing up and walking over to her. "Look," he said, touching her face gently, "I'm not trying to hurt you, but I've built my business from the ground up and it's important to me. You know about that. I know how important your work is to you."

"It's not as important as my family," she managed, the tears now escaping and making their way down her cheeks.

Mark sighed, glancing down at his watch.

"Did you just check your watch?!" She stood up, furious, pacing across the room. "You really don't give a damn how I feel, do you?"

"Don't say it like that! You know I have a meeting…I told you that! I can't be standing here wasting time trying to soothe your hurt feelings. I don't have time for that."

Phyllis stood still for a moment, forcing her heartbeat to slow, calming her breathing. "You know what—you're right. You don't have time for me. You never have." She pushed past him, grabbing her coat off the back of the chair and storming out the door.

* * *

The smoke was thick as she entered the room. This was no Athletic Club. She'd thought about going to the Underground, but she didn't want to take the chance of running into Nick. Well meaning though he may be, she wasn't interested in advice from her ex tonight. Tonight she needed to just forget about everyone and everything for a little while.

Her eyes fell on the empty bar stood and she took a seat, feeling oddly comfortable among the sea of chaos and desperation that sat along side her.

"What'll it be?" the bartender asked, eyeing her incredulously.

"Scotch," she said, without any thought. She rolled he eyes as soon as the word fell from her lips. She couldn't even get drunk without thinking of him.

"Let me get that for you," the clearly inebriated man behind her said. He looked up at the bartender. "Put that on my tab."

"I can pay for my own drinks," Phyllis said quietly, glancing over at him. "But thank you."

He held up his hands. "No offense," he said with a smile. "Is this seat taken?"

"No," she said with a sigh. "It's all yours if you want it."

The man climbed up on the stool, looking at her for a long moment before choosing his words again. "Don't take this the wrong way," he began, "But you don't really look like the type that normally comes in here."

Phyllis smiled slightly as she took a drink from her glass. "Yeah, you're right. I'm not really one of your regulars. Tonight was a special occasion."

He raised his eyebrows, now quite curious. "Really? What've you got going on? We get a lot of anniversaries, lot of divorces…what's your story?"

"None of the above," she sighed. "More of a culmination of epic fails."

"Oh come on…It can't be that bad. Anyone that looks like you can't be having problems of the heart."

She laughed, taking another drink and emptying the glass. "I'm gonna need another," she said, watching as the bartender filled the glass. "You'd be surprised," she sighed.

"Tell me about it."

She shook her head. "No point in depressing you too."

"Ah, come on. You don't know me and I don't know you. You might as well talk to somebody. Who knows, it might actually help."

Phyllis sighed. It couldn't hurt. "Well, tonight I realized that I'm in a relationship that's going absolutely nowhere."

He nodded in sympathy. "Yeah, that sucks. I've been there a few times myself."

She leaned a little closer, beginning to feel the effects of the scotch. "But you know what the crazy thing is?" She waited for him to shake his head. "I never thought it was going anywhere," she whispered. "I know it was completely dead end…and that's the way I wanted it. I needed it to be nothing because I couldn't feel anything."

"Wait a minute? So why are you upset if you knew?"

She laughed, leaning back and almost losing her balance. She felt his hand on her back and whispered a thank you. "It's just like that," she said, looking at him, her eyes suddenly sad. "It's the little stuff like that—I can't forget it. He touches me and I can't forget it. He looks at me and I can't forget. I try to move on and I can't. I tell myself that I have to let it go but I can't."

"You talking about this guy you just broke up with?"

"Noooo…it's not about him. It never was—that's the problem. It was never about him. He was just a distraction."

"So, who exactly are you talking about?" The man studied her face as the bartender refilled her drink.

Phyllis gulped the contents in one quick drink, turning to look at him before she answered.

"I think I'd like to hear that answer myself."

Phyllis stilled, slowly lowering the empty glass to the bar. She turned, knowing without even looking the identity of the man behind her. She'd know his voice anywhere. "Billy," she breathed, "What are you doing here?"


	9. Chapter 9

"You still haven't answered my question," Billy whispered, his eyes still fixed on hers.

"That's because I wasn't talking to you," Phyllis snapped before turning around quickly on the stool. The numerous glasses of scotch were quickly catching up with her and she teetered precariously on the small seat, whispering a hushed thank you to her new friend beside her.

Billy stepped up close behind her. "Why don't you let me take you home?"

"No, thank you. I'm perfectly happy here. I was actually having a very nice conversation with my new friend here…." She looked over at him, realizing she hadn't thought to ask his name.

"Gary," he said quietly. "My name's Gary." He scooted in closer, lowering his voice. "Which one is this—the nowhere guy or…"

Phyllis glared at him. "Gary," she began, raising her voice more than necessary, "And I were actually just talking about the finer points of relationships….weren't we Gar?"

"Is that so?" Billy turned his attention to the man that sat next to her. He'd clearly been drinking himself, but not in a way that made him terribly obnoxious. "Well Gary, is it? You got any advice for me?"

"Pffpt," he chortled, "You realize you're asking someone that's sitting in a bar drinking alone, right?" He gestured to the beer Billy held in his hand. "How many of those have you had?"

"You must be doing something right. You've managed to snag a seat next to the most beautiful woman in the room. That takes some kind of skill, so I'm asking…what's your secret?"

Billy waited for a moment, only then allowing his eyes to drift over towards Phyllis', happy to see a small smile on her face. It made him happy to know he could still get to her—even if she claimed he couldn't. His joy was all too short as he watched another man approach the bar, stopping short as he approached her seat.

"Want to dance?"

Billy watched in abject horror as he sized her up.

"Oh," Phyllis smiled, "I…"

"She can't," Billy interrupted, standing quickly and moving to stand between them.

"She _can't_?"

"No she uh…she promised me the next dance." He turned back, his eyes pleading with her. "Isn't that right?"

For a moment she considered having a little fun, but somehow torturing him didn't seem as appealing as it once had. She was being tortured enough for them both.

"Yeah, that's true, Sorry," she whispered, watching as the guy nodded and walked away.

"You know, I think we're gonna have to have that dance," he said with a small smile, "I'm not sure I want that guy to take me for a liar. He seems like the type to carry around a crowbar for nefarious purposes."

"Maybe," she giggled, "But I'm not even sure I can stand, much less dance and this isn't exactly music to dance to…at least not in public." She blinked and he was standing in front of her with his hand outstretched.

"It'll be fine," he whispered, standing far too close to her now, "I'll hold you up."

* * *

"I don't really think this qualifies as dancing," she muttered, her words slightly slurred now. She felt his chest rumble with laughter as she leaned against him. "It's not funny," she giggled, "Don't laugh at me."

"I'm not laughing at you." The breath left his body in a deep sigh as he pulled her tighter against him. In truth, they weren't really dancing. It was more of a sway, but it was perfect. She was in his arms and that was enough. Her head rested against his chest and the closeness of her body allowed the smell of her perfume to overpower the stench of stale smoke that permeated the building.

He could stay like this forever, just holding her, knowing that, at least as long as she was here, she was safe and she was his, but that wouldn't be right. It wasn't what was best for her and it certainly wasn't what she needed. God only knows how much she'd had to drink tonight and she certainly didn't seem to have been eating anything. Already she was past the point of driving herself anywhere and he couldn't leave her alone here.

Gently, he brought his head close to her face, his lips brushing her forehead for only a second. She turned her head, her green eyes staring up at him, instantly taking his breath. "Why don't you let me take you home?" It took everything in him to force the words from his mouth. The last thing he wanted to do was take her home. He wanted to keep her there with him. He wanted to somehow go back in time and change everything that had happened in the last year, to fix it, to fix them, but he knew all of that was impossible.

She stepped back a bit, pulling away from their embrace. Immediately she stumbled and reached for him, her eyes showing her gratitude when he was there to steady her—just as he always was. "I don't want to go home," she breathed. "I can't go back there…I don't want to go home." She shook her head. "Aly is spending the night with a friend." Her eyes fell on his again. "You can't take me home."

Billy opened his mouth to ask her where she wanted to go, but before he could, he felt her legs give out beneath her, her eyes fluttering closed as he body crumpled. He sighed, gathering her in his arms as he stepped back over the bar.

"Hey Gary," he said quietly, "Could you uh hand me her purse and jacket?"

Gary nodded, and passed over her belongings.

"Thanks," Billy muttered.

"Hey," Gary yelled, standing up and walking over to the door to hold it open for him. "Just so you know…I'm pretty sure she was talking about you."

"What?" The discussion from earlier seemed so long ago now, as if the dance had lasted forever, or at least it had in his mind. "Talking about me when?"

"Earlier, when you walked up on us…she was saying that there was someone she could forget—someone that she couldn't let go of. I'm pretty sure she was talking about you."

* * *

"Phyllis…" He gently jostled her as he opened the car door, hoping the fresh air would rouse her a bit so that he could at least get her inside a little easier. "Phyllis, come on sweetie…can you wake up for me?"

He sighed as he watched her mutter something incomprehensible before falling back into her stupor. "How much did you have exactly?" Inhaling deeply, he gathered her up again, trudging to the front door and struggling to get the door opened. He stopped only for a moment to toss her purse and jacket on the couch before powering up the steps.

He stilled as he reached their bedroom door.

 _"Uh—Don't get me wrong, Billy—this is all kinds of romantic, but I'm pretty sure carrying me through the front door of the house took care of the whole threshold thing." She grinned at him as she lay swept up in his arms._

 _"I'm just making sure," he whispered, leaning in to capture a quick kiss before continuing, "I want to make sure we've got every single one of our bases covered because I don't want anything to possibly cause any bad luck to come our way. After everything we've been through, we deserve every ounce of happiness." He walked her over to the bed, sitting her down on top of it and smiling broadly at her. "How am I doing so far? You happy?"_

 _"I've literally never been this happy, Billy. I keep pinching myself because it all just doesn't feel real. To know that this is our life now—we actually get to have everything we dreamed of. It's not some fairy tale anymore. It's true. It's real. I just…I can't believe it." The tears rolled down her cheeks and she raised her hand to brush them away. Her soft laughter echoed through the room. "I don't know why I'm crying," she whispered, "I'm just happy…I'm really really happy."_

 _He cupped her face in his hand, closing his eyes as he felt her lean in against his palm. "That's good. It's my job to make sure you stay that way."_

Billy looked down at her. So many things had changed since that moment. The house was different. They were no longer married. He'd failed at his job—he hadn't kept her happy. He'd hurt her…just like everyone else had. They now had a daughter together, a beautiful combination of the two of them and the most perfect expression of their love he could have ever hoped for. They had both moved on—with different people, for different reasons, with different results.

However, one thing remained the same. As he looked at her now, she was still the same beautiful, sexy, amazing woman he'd fallen in love with all those years ago. He still wanted to make her happy. It still felt like his job.

"Okay," he muttered, as he finally stepped into the room. "Let's get you settled here." Billy carefully situated her on the bed, raising her head up with extra pillows and easing the covers up over her. He paused a moment to look at her, to marvel at how, even drunk off her ass, she still looked overwhelmingly beautiful. With a smile, he moved to flip off the lamp and turned to walk from the room.

"Billy."

He stilled, turning slowly, surprised to see her eyes open now.

"Hey." He walked back over the edge of the bed, the surprise in his voice evident. "I didn't expect to hear anything else from you tonight. You've been pretty out of it."

Phyllis blinked, bringing her hand up to her head. "Yeah—I…I've felt better."

"I bet," he smiled. "Can I get you anything?"

"Maybe some water?"

He stepped into the bathroom, filling a cup, and quickly returning to her bedside. "Slow sips," he instructed.

"Thanks," she whispered, managing to sip a little before she felt the threat of the water's return. She swallowed hard. "I think that's gonna be enough."

"You okay?" His hand was on her shoulder as he watched her.

"Yeah, I'm okay." Her eyes fluttered closed for a moment before she started to speak. "I don't really remember getting here…I didn't drive here, did I?"

"No..you didn't. I drove you here from the bar." He looked at her. "Do you remember the bar?"

"Yeah," she said softly. "I was at the bar and then I think I remember you and we were…."

He watched her as she seemed to drift away, her eyes floating as if she was lost in a memory. "Were we dancing?"

He laughed. "Yeah, kind of…if you want to call it that…you were leaning. I was dancing."

"That's not very nice," she snapped, half-heartedly attempting to swat at him, but missing his arm entirely. "My aim isn't what it should be," she breathed. "I think I had a little too much tonight."

Billy widened his eyes at the statement. "I think you had a lot too much tonight. You want to tell me what happened that made you think it was a good idea to drive to a dive bar and sidle up to some guy named Gary?"

He saw the flash of concern in her eyes.

"Don't worry…nothing crazy happened. You and Gary were apparently sharing relationship war stories when I showed up."

She leaned back, her mind spinning at full speed. Bits and pieces of the evening seemed to drift through her consciousness like blips in a kaleidoscope and she couldn't get a clear picture. There was no way to know what she said, what he'd heard… "What did I say?" she asked, fearing the answer.

"I don't know," he admitted, "I only heard part of it."

"What part?"

"The part where you said Mark was a distraction…a distraction from someone you couldn't forget." His eyes were heavy on hers as he brought his hand to her face, brushing a lock of hair away from her eyes. "I thought you might have been talking about me."

It couldn't have been the weighted moment. It could have been nerves. It could have been the cool water finally hitting her empty, scotch-filled stomach but, whatever it was, Phyllis lurched forward, struggling to stand as she heaved.

* * *

"Easy," he breathed, as she wretched again.

"You don't have to do this, Billy," she whined in absolute horror. "Seriously this is asking too much." She sighed in relief as she felt the cool rag touch the back of her neck.

"It's okay," he whispered, pulling her hair away from her face. "I don't mind."

"I'll pay for the rug to be cleaned."

He laughed softly. "Don't worry about it. Heather picked it out. I always hated it. It looks like it belongs in an old, dusty library."

Phyllis breathed deeply as she felt his warm hand rub soothing circles on her back. She leaned back, turning to look at him, "I think I might be okay now."

He nodded. "You sure…you want to just sit here for a minute." He stretched out his legs, letting her lean against him, his arm loosely wrapping around her shoulders.

"This certainly takes you back doesn't it?"

Billy smiled, knowing exactly what she meant. "I promised you it would be worth it."

"You were right…worth every second."

"Though, in retrospect, I probably should have kept my mouth shut. It's easy for me to say it would be worth it…all I was doing was holding your hair back."

She turned quickly, looking up at him. "Hey, not true—you were a rock star. You always had ginger-ale and water crackers and you even bought that dog bed, so I didn't have to kneel on the cold tile." She smiled as she thought back. "You were always a good father to your kids, but I knew then how amazing you are…what an amazing husband and father you are..how much you love me, how lucky I am to love someone like…" Her voice trailed off as she heard her words, realizing she was speaking of him in the present.

Feeling his body still, she was certain he'd heard it too. They both sat quiet for a moment, neither knowing how to react.

"You want to try to get some sleep now?" Billy finally offered, afraid the continued silence might shut her down completely.

"Yeah…I probably should."

Billy moved, helping her stand and walking with her over to the bed. Wordlessly he repeated the process from earlier with her assistance, carefully helping her under the covers and switching off the lights. As he moved to walk out of the room, he again heard her call his name.

"Billy…Before you go…."

"Yeah." He turned to face her.

"Earlier tonight…I was talking about you." She watched his small smile as he pulled the door to a close, then closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep.


	10. Chapter 10

He took a deep breath. This could be considered crossing the line, but when had that ever stopped him from doing anything before. It was practically already done, he reasoned, his eyes staring at the bag that lay partially dumped over on the coffee table in front of him. "What the hell," he muttered, reaching into her bag and quickly finding her phone.

Billy turned it over, pressing the home button and staring at the blank screen. He shook his head in utter disbelief. He hadn't even called. Wasn't he the least bit concerned as to where she was, wasn't he worried if she was okay? Phyllis hadn't told him exactly what had happened tonight, but he knew her well enough to know that something had certainly happened with Mark and it couldn't have been good. What kind of a man just lets her walk out of his life without doing anything to try and stop it. Billy swallowed hard as he answered his own question. It was a hell of a question to ask when he'd done the same damn thing himself.

Silently he laid the phone back on the table, slumping back against the sofa. He stared up at the ceiling the once naturally exposed wooden beams now painted in a bright coat of white paint. Heather claimed it made the place look more cozy, but he knew the truth. From the moment she'd moved in, she'd tried to do everything she could to make the house different, to erase the little touches he and Phyllis had added in to make the house their own. She could change the paint. She could hang new artwork. She could buy new furniture and rearrange the rooms, but she the one thing she couldn't take away were the memories.

Billy glanced next to him, his eyes falling on throw that still lay beside him on the couch…

 _"You sure I shouldn't call the doctor?" he asked, helping her over to the couch and covering her with a throw._

 _Phyllis smiled weakly as she looked into his concerned eyes. "Unless they've come up with a cure for morning sickness in the last twenty-four hours, I'm pretty sure there's nothing they can do."_

 _"Who says I was talking about calling for you—I may need them to check me out? You almost gave me a heart attack in there." Softly he brushed the hair away from her face. "Why didn't you call me?"_

 _Her hand covered his as she looked up at him. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you. I thought I was just nauseated—I didn't know I was dizzy until I stood up and by then…well…"_

 _He nodded, his mind flashing back to the image of her body on the floor. "From now on, you call me…regardless. Until you're through this, you don't get up like that without me in there."_

 _"Don't you think that's a little overboard?" Her head tilted a bit, her eyes lighting up as her lips curved into a smile, "Or is this just your way of keeping flat on my back for the duration?"_

 _She felt her heart flutter as she heard his soft laughter. "I'm hurt that you'd think such a thing of me," he grinned, leaning in to kiss her lips softly. "Seriously though," Billy sighed. "I hate seeing you like this. Are you sure there's nothing I can get you. You want some tea…maybe some crackers?"_

 _She closed her eyes tight, holding up her hand to stop his words. "Please don't mention food again. I don't want anything…honestly. Nothing." She paused to let a slow breath leave her body. "Didn't you go through any of this with Victoria? This can't be news to you."_

 _"It was different with Vic…she never really….well…there was Stitch and it was…"_

 _"Complicated," Phyllis whispered, finishing his sentence with ease as she often did. "It's alright," she said quietly, reaching for his hand. "I think it's sweet that you're worried, but really there's nothing you can do. This will last until it's over and then I'll move on to something else. It's all part of the package."_

Billy sighed as he glanced up towards the stairs. Even as strong as Phyllis professed to be, there were some things even she couldn't control. He'd forgotten how reluctant she was to ask for help, even when she clearly needed it. If anything happened to her, he'd never be able to live with himself.

He stood and headed up the stairs.

* * *

Relief flooded his body as he peered into the now slightly open door. She lay on her side, her legs curled up to her chest, her eyes fluttering a bit as if she were lost in a dream. He could feel his body relax, the simple knowledge that she was okay bringing him comfort.

As quietly as possible he stepped into the room. He needed to be here, to know she was okay, the image of her on the floor all those years ago now plaguing his brain. His eyes spotted the chair in the corner and he walked over quickly, pulling it towards the side of the bed. The sound of the wooden legs against the bare floor made an audible scratch and he stilled immediately as she stirred.

Sighing, he walked over to the bed, finally relenting to this only option. Carefully he removed his shoes and eased himself onto the bed, careful not to disturb her. As he allowed his body to relax against the pillow, he sensed her movement again. It was as if she somehow sensed his presence, even in her slumber and he couldn't bring himself to move away as she wrapped herself around him and rested her head on his chest.

His breathing slowed, his body relaxed, and his mind finally cleared as he brought his lips to her forehead and softly kissed her. His eyes finally closed—Now, even if only for tonight, life was as it should be.

* * *

It was just barely daylight and, though he didn't want to, he'd finally managed to extricate himself for her sleeping embrace. Phyllis would, no doubt, be feeling lousy this morning and he'd stumbled down the stairs determined to scrounge up dry toast, coffee, and two aspirin. He placed the offerings on the table, glancing up at the stairs again and wondering when she'd be down.

The thought crept into his mind again and he tried desperately to shove it away. Mark.

It wasn't his place to call him. If he'd been the least bit concerned, he could have called her phone but, he reasoned, maybe she'd asked him not to, or maybe he'd been afraid to disturb her. Though he had his opinions of him, the decent thing to do was to at least let him know she was okay.

Billy walked into the living room and picked up her phone, scrolling through the list of contacts and quickly finding his number. He rolled his eyes as he pressed the button, almost surprised to get the immediate answer.

"Phyllis?" Mark said, the tone more irritated that concerned, "Where the hell are you?"

"It's not Phyllis," Billy said, now questioning his actions more than ever.

There was a pause. "Who is this?" Mark drew in a breath, his heart beating a bit harder now. He wasn't heartless, no matter what anyone thought. He never wanted to hurt her and he certainly didn't want… "Is Phyllis alright?"

Billy sighed. "She's okay. This is Billy." He heard the huff on the other end of the line. "I just wanted you to know that I found Phyllis last night. She was upset. She was hanging out at a bar and she had a little too much, so I brought her back to my place to sleep it off. She's here now, but she's okay."

"I'll be there in ten."

"Wait..I.." Billy stopped, bringing the phone away from his ear and staring at it. "Well, this should be fun."

* * *

"Where is she?"

"Good morning, Mark. Sure, come on in." Billy countered as Mark pushed past him into the living room. He stared at Mark as he turned around to face him. "She's still asleep. She had a pretty rough night in case you missed that part."

"I didn't miss that part," he snapped. "I just thought maybe since she'd been out all night without so much as a word, she might actually be ready to come talk to me now."

"Ah, well…I'm really not so sure she's gonna be in a real talkative mood this morning to tell you the truth. I would have told you that on the phone so you didn't have to waste your time coming all the way over here, but you kind of hung up in my face…"

"Well, whether she's in the mood or not, I think she owes me an explanation," he sneered, his eyes now locked on Billy.

"I don't think she owes you a damn thing actually, so why don't' you just head on back to your office. I know how valuable your time is. I'll take care of Phyllis."

"You know what, pal. I don't much care for your attitude. Where do you get off acting like you have some kind of say in what Phyllis does? She's not yours anymore."

Billy glared at him, the truth in his words making him more angry than anything else. "She's not a possession. She doesn't belong to anyone, but to your point, I know she's not my wife. That doesn't mean I don't care about her and it sure as hell doesn't mean I'm going to stand around and watch someone hurt her."

"And you didn't hurt her? You didn't even care about her enough to stay married to her…you had her, you had your chance." Mark shook his head, heading towards the stairs. "She up there?"

Billy was in front of him, blocking the stairs in an instant. "You think I divorced her because I didn't care about her? Is that what you think? You think a piece of paper changes feelings that have existed for years?" He stepped closer to him, his entire body tense with anger. "I agreed to that divorce because it was what she asked me to do. It was what she wanted and I can't tell you how many times I've wondered if I let go too quickly—if I should have fought harder, but I cared too much. I was so afraid of hurting her more that I needed to do what she asked—what she said she wanted, what she said she needed. I didn't walk away because I didn't care or because I didn't love her. I walked away because I loved her too much to hurt her…because I still do."

He was screaming now. The rage inside him impossible to quell and the volume of his words had drowned out the soft footsteps behind him.

"Maybe he's not the one you should tell that to," Phyllis said softly, her hands trembling as she watched Billy turn slowly around to face her.

"I didn't know you were…"

She smiled softly at him. "So I gathered."

Billy stepped aside as she walked gingerly down the steps. She stopped in front of Mark. "You can go," she said softly. "And you can things out of the apartment or I can have them sent to you…whatever you'd like. You and I both know this is over."

Mark stared at her for a moment. "Let's be honest," he said quietly.

She nodded, looking into his eyes which showed honest emotion for, what she thought, was the first time. "Okay."

"We never even started." He leaned in, kissing her cheek softly. "You take care."

Billy stood quietly as he watched him walk from the room. It seemed inherently strange to watch the dissolution of a relationship happen in front of your eyes. "I'm sorry," he said quietly, walking over to where she stood.

Phyllis looked up at him. "It was never going to work. We never had a real chance."

"Why do you say that?" He stood silent, his eyes darting back and forth as he watched her lips curl into the most disarming grin.

She stepped towards him, closing the gap that existed between them, her body pressing up against his. "Because I love you, Billy Abbott. I've never stopped and I never will."

This was, he imagined, what skydiving would feel like—that instantaneous rush of adrenaline mixed with overwhelming wonder and, of course, a touch of fear. "I love you too," he whispered, his hand finding it's home in her tousled hair.

"And," she smiled, letting her lips hover just above his, "I found some mouthwash upstairs, so I can finally do this." She closed her eyes as her lips found his. It would only make sense that she'd found her way here in her darkest moment—back to their house and back to his arms.

* * *

 ** _Epilogue_**

 _Two Years Later_

"Hey," she giggled, "I don't think I need sunscreen under the swimsuit."

Billy held up his hands, shrugging with innocent eyes. "I'm just being cautious—skin cancer is very serious and I want to make sure you are extra protected." He smiled as he leaned down to kiss her lips, sitting down the bottle and allowing her lean back against him in their oversized lounge chair.

"We need to call her back in a bit and reapply," she whispered, glancing back at him. She blocked the sun with her hand as she looked over to the shore where Aly played happily. "I swear that child would build sandcastles twenty four seven if you let her."

"It's a good gig if you can get it," Billy sighed, "I wouldn't mind hanging out here with you all day."

"Yeah, well, unfortunately we both have those pesky jobs that we have to get back to eventually." She snuggled into his arms, shuddering at the kisses he placed on her the ticklish part of her neck. "Even if I am enjoying every second of this…"

"You sure," he asked, looking at Phyllis in seriousness, "You don't feel like you got cheated out of a real honeymoon—this being so family-oriented?"

Phyllis turned quickly, her eyes widening. "Why would you think that? I love that we're here together"

"I know," he whispered. "I do too, it's just…if I recall…" His lips brushed against her ear as he leaned in ever closer, "our last honeymoon wasn't anywhere near this kid-friendly—in fact our last honeymoon is how we got that kid."

"Trust me, I haven't forgotten, but there's plenty of time for more trips like that. This is special..this is about our family being back together. This is perfect." She sighed with happiness as she felt his arms wrap tighter around her.

"Mommy! Daddy! Come look!" Aly called out to them from the beach.

"I think we're being summoned," Billy smiled, standing and holding his hand out to help Phyllis up. They walked down the beach hand in hand to see Aly's creation.

"Look at that," Phyllis said softly, as she squeezed Billy's hand. Her eyes glistened with tears as she looked up at him. It was amazing how, at only six, she was able to figure out something that took them years to learn. It was all there in her simple expression—a heart drawn in the sand with three letters—P,B, and A.

It wouldn't always be easy. Life never was, but every night—no matter what happened—whether they were doing some work leftover from the office, having a glass of wine, or thinking about an argument or disagreement—somehow their eyes would drift up to the ceiling. The wooden beams, now stripped of their paint now bore a new image, something that meant much more, something it had taken their six year old daughter to remind them of—a simple heart bearing the letters of their names. Family, home, and heart—that was their new normal.

 _ **The End**_


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